xeni at September 20th, 2013 16:37 — #1
versuchsanstalt at September 20th, 2013 17:23 — #2
Regarding the title: That's what the mother says in the video.
Doesn't seem to be funny from the kid's perspective.
But hey - maybe I'm too old-fashioned for this kind of stuff. I'm not an expert at laughing about other people's emotional confusion. Should I learn and practice ridiculing unnerved kids?
tehcleaninglady at September 20th, 2013 17:43 — #3
Not really missing. More like surprised in a scary and uncomfortable kind of way.
old at September 20th, 2013 17:45 — #4
There's not much I remember from age 3, but I recall clearly an incident very reminiscent of this.
vrplumber at September 20th, 2013 17:45 — #5
tehcleaninglady at September 20th, 2013 17:45 — #6
No, this is just witty lighthearted slightly cruel mainstream lack of EI. Please do not join in
miasm at September 20th, 2013 18:15 — #7
They may have made their kid cry but they posted the video too.
Probably it's quite important to experience jarring changes in people's appearances for the first time, in a safe and loving environment.
But I do now think it might have been interesting to see the reaction if baby had watched daddy shave.
boundegar at September 20th, 2013 18:30 — #8
What an adorable little test subject! I had the same experience once, although the child was not mine. A familiar voice coming from a different face creeps the hell out of kids. Fun for the whole family!
alaskagrown at September 20th, 2013 18:31 — #9
My kids cried about 1,000 times per day at that age, or at least it felt like it. Something they were delighted by one minute, they found horrifying the next. When we gave older boy a haircut, younger boy was thrilled at his brother's new fuzzy noggin, but it could have easily been the other way around. Long story short, I don't think it's cruel. You can't protect a 1-year old from everything that could possibly make them feel alarmed.
She's adorable and her bond with her dad is evident.
rausantaella at September 20th, 2013 18:47 — #10
What I don't really understand is how in the seven hells did that guy take off the beard SO FAST. It takes me ten minutes to deal with the stubble alone!
tehcleaninglady at September 20th, 2013 18:52 — #11
She's adorable and her bond with her dad is evident.
You can't protect a 1-year old from everything that could possibly make them feel alarmed.
No, you can't, and this is not what I mean. I will explain.
The child is crying in distress, and the distress is clearly not about missing something. I detect confusion, fear, discomfort.
Unfortunately, instead of validating the child's emotions (which sends the message "what you are feeling is real and I am here for you while you deal with it"), the mother tries to reframe them by cheerfully insisting that the child is missing the beard. This, while completely innocent and widespread approach is very confusing to the child and prevents her from feeling her real emotion (which equals healing the distress) and moving on.
The kid goes to feel and discharge anyway, but on her own, without the emotional connection to the parent who insists that she feels something else.
The healthy response to this would be a drama-free "Oh, I see you didn't expect this" and a hug while she cries the distress out.
What I find slightly cruel and disrespectful (as in, I would not do it to an adult friend whom I respect and value): manipulating a situation to see how she'll react, taking a video without her consent, and posting the video without her consent.
If you disagree that it is OK to take a video of someone in distress and post it on youtube without their consent, I guess I have no solid argument. Ultimately this is about acting with respect for human beings, regardless of age, in an age of active age-ism
I know, getting consent about abstract things from one-year-olds is not possible. And no, that's not an excuse for doing them anyway.
gtrjnky at September 20th, 2013 18:55 — #12
Lighten up folks, it's cute.
wrybread at September 20th, 2013 19:10 — #13
Oh come on, that child is clearly in a super loving environment, the parents are clearly smart and funny and they're all bonded ridiculously well, and my money says they're bringing up another great human being. Its all part of being playful with one another. Lighten up.
ethel at September 20th, 2013 19:32 — #14
She's not missing the beard, she is missing her dad - there is a creepy dude who picked her up that is like her dad but does not fit her brain image of her dad.
Get over the beard, she'd do the same thing if mom got a haircut.
dr_bombay at September 20th, 2013 19:34 — #15
man, i miss that beard. he was quite attractive with it.
codinghorror at September 20th, 2013 19:36 — #16
Is the "concern trolling" I have read about?
Isn't it a zillion times over obvious from the video that the baby girl is in an extremely loving, compassionate home?
ladyfingers at September 20th, 2013 20:18 — #17
In a similar vein, I've noticed that nearly all the women I've known who preferred bearded men had bearded fathers.
ken_murphy at September 20th, 2013 20:27 — #18
I want to see the video where the girlfriend/wife starts crying when seeing her SO without a beard for the first time.
snig at September 20th, 2013 20:47 — #19
I'm waiting for the video in 15 years when she gets a purple mohawk before an important event, Dad flips out, and she points out "I'm still me, Dad..."
aaronlibrarian at September 20th, 2013 21:02 — #20
Yeah, I kinda don't get why the beard shaving was done behind closed doors; it was almost like it was done to elicit a reaction. I'm not saying or implying these parents are abusing their child, but seeing the guy lose his beard so quickly was confusing to me as well. And not just because I'm a beard wearer and enthusiast
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