For Christians, a new demon

Perfect! Just the thing to liven up my D&D game: yoga demons!

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Many Christian holidays are actually repurposed Pagan holidays. I guess that makes them unholy, too. Or have they been sterilized by The Force of Juhyeezus?

The people who believe this also tend to have a complicated justification for Christian holidays wherein they believe they were completely separate holidays started by Christians in competition with the Pagan holidays, or something. So they’re safe. (And somehow they ended up adopting all the trappings of the original Pagan holidays, but let’s not mention that.) My aunt sent me some pamphlets about it once after I mentioned the Pagan roots of all modern Christian holidays - the argument doesn’t make a lot of sense, but it allows them to be ok with tradition. Because that’s really what this is all about - justifying why the things you grew up with are good, but anything new and unfamiliar is bad.

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I was trying to make a joke about christian zealots disliking yoga not just because they have rigid view points, but because they want to physiscally embody rigidness and yoga is an affront to that. In short, christian zealots don’t want to be able to touch their toes because that would be ungodly.

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Hey when the Christian minority in the USA starts being systematically profiled because of their religion, systematically harassed because of their religious garb, and systematically discriminated against by the government for their choice of who to marry, how to have sex, and not to use birth control, THEN you can raise this complaint.

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You think there are no gay Christians, or pro-choice Christians? I imagine you know there are. I understand where you are coming from on the bitterness, but you do have allies who are Christians. Painting them all as superstitious (as in OP) or as all bigots just plays into the hands of the superstitious, bigoted Christians. The ones who are perfectly happy to be counted as the only Real True Christians. And who are treated as such by the US media. So, kind of a bad strategy, even if you don’t give a damn about the hurt feelings of the other Christians.

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Sung to the tune of “I am the very model of a modern major general” by Gilbert and Sullivan.
Passed on to me by a close friend, who’s a Unitarian.

I am the very model of a modern Unitarian

Rev. Christopher Raible

I am the very model of a modern Unitarian,
Far broader than a Catholic, Hindu, Jew or Presbyterian.
I know the world’s religions and can trace their roots historical
From Moses up to Channing, all in order categorical.
I’m very well acquainted, too, with theories theological,
On existential questions I am always wholly logical,
About most any problem I am teeming with a lot of views,
I’m full of fine ideas that should fill our church’s empty pews.

(Chorus members:
We’re full of fine ideas that should fill our church’s empty pews.
We’re full of fine ideas that should fill our church’s empty pews.
We’re full of fine ideas that should fill our church’s empty empty pews. )

I quote from Freud and Jung and all the experts psychological.
I’m anti nuke, I don’t pollute I’m chastely ecological.
In short, in matters spiritual, ethical, material,
I am the very model of a modern Unitarian.

(Chorus members:
In short, in matters spiritual, ethical, material,
We are the very model of a modern Unitarian.)

I use the latest language; God is never Father or the Lord,
But Ground of Being, Source of Life or almost any other word.
I never pray, I meditate, I’m leary about worshipping.
I serve on 10 committees none of which accomplish anything.
I give to worthy causes and I drive a gas conserving car,
I have good UU principles (although I’m not sure what they are).
I’m open to opinions of profound or broad variety,
Unless they’re too conservative or smack of righteous piety.

(Chorus members:
Unless they’re too conservative or smack of righteous piety.
Unless they’re too conservative or smack of righteous piety.
Unless they’re too conservative or smack of righteous pie-piety. )

I formulate agendas and discuss them with the best of 'em,
But don’t ask me to implement, we leave that to the rest of 'em.
In short in matters spiritual, ethical, material,
I am the very model of today’s religious liberal.

(Chorus members:
In short, in matters spiritual, ethical, material,
We are the very model of today’s religious liberal. )

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When I see blanket disavowals of the crazy Christians by the sane ones, then I will concede my point.

It’s kinda like the quote: “if there were any good cops, there would be no bad cops.”

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cringe

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If your body is achy and tight, you can pray lots and god will make you feel nice. If your body is nice and relaxed, why would you bother hiking to join the congregation?

You left out the word “all” between “for” and “Christians.”

Oh, so did Beschizza! How about that.

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Is there a 9th beatitude about this? Blessed are those who are sore or have a pulled groin…

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So goes the War on Non-Christianity.

But seriously, the organized Church is so worried about losing market share that they feel they simply must declare war on anything and anyone that potentially threatens their continued power, influence and income.

Maybe it’s time to start talking about loving others as yourself rather than judging and punishing.

I once put it thusly:

Most “Christians” I have ever met are more interested in being godlike than christlike.

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about to look at the link but i am guessing it is not cos-play yoga

Hang on a minute, surely there’s a Chick tract to enlighten us on this subject!

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Fortunately, there’s a wholesome, Christian-approved alternative:
Pole Dancing for Jesus

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What isn’t a gripe with those people?

For some Christians, an Unitarian Minister, and a female to boot, is a demon just as well.

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They can touch their toes, but they mustn’t linger unduly.