xeni at May 5th, 2014 11:49 — #1
jerry_vandesic at May 5th, 2014 12:01 — #2
Should be easy to identify him. Just look for the guy with the pointer shaped tattoo on his left cheek.
crenquis at May 5th, 2014 12:04 — #3
When I saw employees at waffle house fight back against a pitchfork wielding hoodlum, I had visions of of a protracted artillery defense -- waffles/etc being flung and impaled upon said pitchfork...
simonize at May 5th, 2014 12:33 — #4
When they make pitchforks illegal, only criminals will have pitchforks. The best answer to a bad man with a pitchfork, is a good man with a pitchfork. They can have my pitchfork when they pry my cold, dead hands off of it. A pitchfork wielding society is a polite society....thank you, we'll be here all week, don't forget to tip the waitresses
wrecksdart at May 5th, 2014 12:35 — #5
'specially cause they're armed.
boundegar at May 5th, 2014 12:52 — #6
edked at May 5th, 2014 12:58 — #7
The term "Southern Gentleman" in the headline implied that he wore some sort of Col. Sanders-style white suit and had a florid manner of speaking. Imagine my disappointment...
socialmaladroit at May 5th, 2014 13:44 — #8
Sounds like an episode of Cagney & Lacey -- starring Tine Daily and Sharin' Glass.
halloween_jack_ at May 5th, 2014 13:46 — #9
Laugh if you will, but--and I think that I speak for all of my fellow Frankenstein-Americans here--people just don't realize how much pitchfork-related violence there is every year, especially if you live (or "live", if you prefer) in a castle above a normally-sleepy village.
noahdjango at May 5th, 2014 14:02 — #10
You might be a redneck if you held-up a Waffle House with a pitchfork.
I dunno what I am, but I guess I'm whatever you would call a guy so out-of-touch that he gets his local news from BoingBoing.
rjmeelar at May 5th, 2014 14:26 — #11
He was looking for Frankenstein's castle and had to stop for a snack and for got his wallet. Innocent mistake....
othermichael at May 5th, 2014 14:27 — #12
GODDAMMIT! Today, seriously, it actually hurts when I laugh.
noahdjango at May 5th, 2014 15:31 — #13
it's part of the gang initiation. they give you the pointer tattoo in jail after you throw a pitchfork through your first hard drive.
humbabella at May 5th, 2014 16:26 — #14
I wish I had the photoshop skills to modify that guy with the MURDER tattoo to say PITCHFORK. Instead I will have to rely on your imagination.
brainspore at May 5th, 2014 17:43 — #15
If you think this guy is a badass you should see his grandparents.
redesigned at May 5th, 2014 20:03 — #16
maybe when he brandished his huge fork and said "give me all your waffles" he was just a really hungry dude...
samwinston at May 5th, 2014 22:16 — #17
Great...now I really want hash browns. Waffle house hash browns are a thing of beauty.
Grilled cheese extra pickle, Hash Brown Scattered and smothered. Maybe a side salad or bacon.
hereticbranding at May 6th, 2014 04:00 — #18
In other Gwinnett County news: Action reporter Tony Thomas is under investigation after a WSB cameraman was seriously injured in what authorities are calling "a suspicious pitchfork incident."
nikolai77 at May 6th, 2014 16:19 — #19
Well, looks like we got ourselves a pitchforker.
redesigned at May 6th, 2014 17:23 — #20
I don't understand this thing called -maybe- bacon... Isn't bacon a MUST?
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