TSA's "12 Banned Items of Christmas"

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I usually get amused reading legal codes around the world and how centuries of customs, isolated particularities, and national singularities leave some insane wacky laws or at least a bunch of useless or counter intuitive regulations.

But then there is the TSA, who has produced one of the most insane and retarded code possible in just a mere decade.

Congratulations, TSA! I’m deeply sorry, USA.

Merry Xmas!

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Had the misfortune of going through TSA at Philly a week ago, after many years of (wisely) actively avoiding it. It struck me that - compared to most European or Canadian security, - the TSA is pretty much the most inefficient bunch of slack losers I’ve ever seen. I think it’s an uncontrollable bureaucracy that has stumbled upon the perfect excuse for anything it wants to do : every time you criticize it, it just invokes National Security (or the creepy sounding “Homeland Security”) and that’s it - discussion closed.

Seriously, America, if you really care about airline security, you need to abolish the TSA and replace it with something that works.

Also, for some reason, I was “TSA Precheck” which I thought could only be given to US citizens. Didn’t matter anyway, as I was treated by the TSA as all the rest of the untermenschen, US citizen or not.

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If I can’t carry on guacamole but can carry on avocados, what happens if I make guacamole in-the-air? Rendition by government spooks for party dip?

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What’s always baffled me is that you can carry on a corkscrew, but you can’t open your own alcohol. So why would you need a corkscrew?

Not to mention, I think one could do rather a lot of damage with a corkscrew. Certainly more than with nail clippers.

No more than you’d deserve; guacamole is fucking minging.

Under pressure, guacamole becomes explosive. True fact.

Not really. No. TSA, can’t we all just enjoy a little Mexican without you getting your panties in a wad?

Some of these are just exceptions in order to make life less miserable for certain groups of people (nursing mothers might need to breastfeed multiple times and don’t have anywhere to do it in privacy when flying economy, cartridges for self-inflating life vests are part of important safety gear and might not be available at your destination), or when there is obviously no terrorist danger (it’s easier to make explosives look like pie filling or guacamole than pies and avocados, live fish probably wouldn’t survive long in liquid explosives). I don’t agree with the principle of the rule as a whole, but I’m not sure I’d really want to complain too much about the double standards here either.

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