A DRM-locked, $400 tea-brewing machine from the Internet of Shit timeline

I’ll stick with my Mr. Tea; thank you.

Father Guido Sarducci: Thank you. Something a-wonderful has happened to-a me. I was-a chosen to be the SPOKESMAN for this-a wonderful new product. And, Bill, I want to thank you, because the reason they picked me was because they saw me on-a this show. And-a, really, from-a the bottom of-a my heart, I do thank you.

And, you know, Joe DiMaggio does-a this-a commercial – he’s-a the spokesman for something called-a Mr. Coffee, and-a I think that’s-a why-a they-a wanted me, too. This-a product, it’s-a called Mr. Tea. Mr. Tea. And-a, you know, I don’t even drink-a tea. And I said to them, “I don’t-a drink-a tea,” but they said, “That’s okay. We want you anyway.” And-a, I just-a love-a this-a product. What I like about it is, it’s-a SO simple. All you have to do is get-a like a tea cup, or a coffee cup, whatever you call it, and you put a tea bag right inside of it here, and then you put the cup – it fits right in here – and then, you get hot, boiling water… and-a just-a pour the hot water into the Mr. Tea machine… [ he demosntrates these actions ] And, as-a you can see, the water comes-a down through here, down there, right into the cup! And then, all you have to do is wait two, three minutes… and then it’s done! And it depends – if you want it real strong, I’ve found that you should-a leave the tea bag in there quite a while. And, also, if you-a don’t want it strong, you can use it two, three times over and over, so it’s-a real economical, too.

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