I’m saying that the ability to reproduce sexually requires the sexes to be able to distinguish one another with a high degree of probability. I’ve got about 6.5 billion data points that suggest we’re pretty good at it.
You seem to be requiring absolute certainties and I’m sorry, but I’ve none to offer. Natural entities are inherently troublesome to classify (duck-billed platypus?). However, sex is one distinction where, most of the time, nature provides pretty good signals to the particular organisms that need to know. Can we intentionally, or sometimes unintentionally, have persons that blur these lines? Of course. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Diversity and tolerance make the world a great place and all persons deserve to be treated fairly.
This is simply the way things are naturally. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean this is the way they should be. I’m completely open to humans shaping a better moral world than the one nature has dealt us.