Florida governor DeSantis says the state is reopening Monday

boing
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zim-gir-doom-old-computer

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“almost as dangerous as Australia.”

Covid-19 infections and deaths per 1 million population at April 30, 2020, 05:34 GMT
U.S.A. Cases 3,216, Deaths 186
Florida Cases 632, Deaths 58
Australia Cases 265, Deaths 4

U.S. Average Life Expectancy (2019) 78.87 years
Australia Average Life Expectancy (2019) 83.35 years

The ‘dangerous Australia’ meme developed when Australians discovered that the insular ignorance of Americans made them particularly susceptible to being spoofed about how dangerous its wildlife made it.
For deaths by animals in Australia see: https://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-11-27/sharks-snakes-crocodiles-horses-australias-most-dangerous/10534786?nw=0

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But remember, the WWE was declared ‘essential’ for reasons of money.

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Florida Man, Florida Man,
Doing the things that Florida can.
What’s the science? It’s not important,
Florida Man…

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Don’t forget the fire ants. I had a friend who managed to have a car accident on his way home on a county road after a long night of heavy drinking. He got thrown out of the car into some sandy palmetto scrub, unconscious with a what turned out to be a badly broken collarbone. He spent the entire night before anyone found him early the next morning lying in a fire ant bed.

He said he would take a hundred more broken collarbones rather than one more fire ant bite.

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This.
Trump doesn’t shove somebody under the bus, Trump is the bus.

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Someone has to graduate bottom of the class.

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The bus that will explode if it stops or slows below 50mph as it careers wildly the wrong way down the highway scattering all normal traffic in front of it. Someone get a stinger, please. It would be a worthy explosion.

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The epitome of hybrid vigor; lack of Covid 19 comprehension crossed with the Peter Principle

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How long before someone tries to “stand their ground” against another person who’s coughing or sneezing near them, claiming Florida’s law permits them to do so if they feel their life is threatened by COVID-19?

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shirts

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The Republican effort to kill off people 65 and older seems to be hurting them in the polls.

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As they say:
Q. What do you call the guy who graduated from medical school last in his class?
A. Doctor.

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Looking at the state trends last night, NYC is WAY down from our peak. the southeast is all trending UP. fucking insane that at this stage, there are states trending up and talking like this. and that’s with all the stat shenanigans. I can’t wait for everyone to flee back to NYC with their Florida COVID and give NYC a second wave right after we all busted our asses to get our rate down.

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Ahh, the scrub palmetto! I understand Boingboing is mostly a southern thing, but for the benefit of the northerners here (you unfortunate few!): Your scrub palmetto is well-named, a small scrubby palm, low to the ground and bushy, common in the sandy wild but popular in town as an ornamental and a boundary marker. It’s also called a “sword palmetto” because each one of the long sword-shaped leaves comes to a sharp woody point. Like if a kid, a bad kid, high on sour gummies and Game of Thrones, made a construction paper sword (folded lengthwise for stiffness) and then plussed it by taping a needle to the business end. Multiplied a couple dozen times, gathered together into a lovely bouquet and placed conveniently by the sidewalk. A runner friend of mine was out with the Hash House Harriers and, overdoing it on the shots (kamikazes, aptly enough) in the drinking phase, missed a corner during the running phase. He was a sprinter, his companions were marathoners, he liked to show off with the sudden bursts of speed. I wasn’t there to see it happen but I saw the t-shirt the next day, pierced and torn, stained with the blood of the mighty struggle. His favorite shirt, thenceforth. Wore that thing to bits.

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I’d like to see his “data”.

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Well, this is distressing and unfortunate news. Gov. DeSantis is really trying to suck up to the “big guy”, ain’t he?
As I have commented before, the Keys are still stopping traffic inbound from the mainland, north of Key Largo and have committed to keeping the block up throughout May. The islands are effectively closed to tourists, including hotels, rental properties, beaches and restaurants/ bars. This, too, is unfortunate as tourism is the lifeblood of the Florida Keys (and, to a lesser extent, the state at large) but the closure IS keeping residents safe and should not be lofted “on Monday” as the governor says.

Blockquote

THE KEYS ARE CLOSED TO VISITORS. MONROE COUNTY DOES NOT ANTICIPATE OPENING TO VISITORS DURING THE MONTH OF MAY. ALL THOSE ENTERING THE KEYS SHOULD CARRY BACKUP IDENTIFICATION OR DOCUMENTS PROVING HOMEOWNERSHIP OR RESIDENCY.

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A small selection of the esteemed alumni from both institutions:

Yale
George Bush
George W Bush
Clarence Thomas
Dick Fucking Cheney
Bart O’Kavanaugh
Steve Mnuchin
Ben “Can You Believe I’m A Brain Surgeon!?!” Carson

Harvard
Mark Zuckerberg
Mitt “47%” Romney
Henry Kissinger
Mike Bloomberg
Jim Cramer
Bill O’Reilly
John “What Voting Rights Act?” Roberts
Jared “Middle East Liberator” Kushner

Extraordinary privilege implies nothing other than extraordinary privilege.

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Which is part of a larger problem with Florida’s closure of “non-essential” businesses. Only in April did the closure happen, but they were still deciding what the “essential” businesses were after they did it. So wrestling was shut down… but for less than two weeks. I’m assuming similar things happened with other businesses.

It’s become abundantly clear - the only data he cares about is the amount of money the state is spending to help those who aren’t able to work. For Republicans, giving people money to not work goes against all their instincts. Also, that’s “socialism,” so that can’t be allowed, no matter how many people will die.

Actual public health considerations don’t even come into the decision-making process here.

I’ve seen some absolute morons - worse than anyone on that list - come from those institutions, in particular their law schools. Like, absolutely incapable of any kind of critical thinking, on any level. Whatever the opposite of an advertisement is, they functioned as walking versions thereof for those institutions. They totally demolished the idea that attending those institutions indicates anything about either the intelligence of the alumni or the quality of education given.

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Mother nature is telling Floridians stay the hell indoors if you know what’s good for you


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