🍅 Hate the Chef, love the Condiments 🌭


my first cubemate started Planet Ranch years ago. I always enjoyed his, “What I Ate With Ranch” posts.



This is literally happening right now. Suck it, ketchup.


There was a feature on the now-defunct Jezebel sub-blog Kitchenette that was stories from restaurant servers and cooks. One of the ones I remember most is the family that asked for giant bowls of ranch dressing and proceeded to use it on everything. And I do mean “everything”. They put it in their iced tea.

EDIT: It’s still up! Last story: http://kitchenette.jezebel.com/people-in-restaurants-do-the-weirdest-shit-to-their-foo-1622750716


BEHIND KITCHEN DOORS! Oh man, I loved that sub!

Wait, no… Behind Closed Ovens!



This actually exists. Available at your local Rocket Fizz.

:game_die: Would You LIKE to Play a Game? :video_game:

Ugh. No.


Welp, I guess I’m starting my diet like … right this very second.


You’re having slugs on your hot dogs?

Bon Appétit!


Wrong on all counts. Super-duper-extra wrong on the last count. The answer you’re looking for is mayo.


[Yes, I am evil. Why do you ask?]

@nothingfuture: Mac & cheese is a perfect application for most varieties of hot sauces. Ketchup will work in a pinch, and is the only thing that will make leftover Kraft edible, but it has to be real ketchup from the likes of Trader Joe’s.


I’d love to see slugs try and live in that much salt and mustard.


Maybe they’re mutant slugs with highly resistant mucus?


Are we all familiar with the sordid history of ketchup? Because, let me tell you: it’s gross.


Ditch the Heinz and whateverthefuck that other brand is, and get some without fake sugar. Shouldn’t have more than about 5 ingredients in it: be tomato, spices, vinegar, sugar, and a pinch of salt.


Or: go big.

Roasted Tomato Ketchup. Oh holy yes (but still not on a hotdog).


I don’t even eat hot dogs (no land animals in my diet, and I don’t even want to think about what might be found in Notdogs), I’m just enjoying the theatrics here.


Putting salt and mustard on slugs is wrong.

If you’re gonna eat slugs do what we did when I was at summer camp: fry them in garlic butter.


Disclaimer, did not read the thread yet. Why are you people at such a different time schedule?
Ketchup, when well made, is pure tomato elixir. And indeed, when used in several occasions, definitely a food group in itself. :wink:


The only reason to put ketchup on a hotdog is if you’ve run out of curry sauce.


Whattaya mean? It’s Ketchup time I mean dinnertime there now, isn’t it?