HPV cancers a mystery in men

Why isn’t oral sex discussed more and more openly? If a man likes to perform oral sex on a female and she has the HPV virus in her system then it tends to make sense that the virus can migrate to the males sinuses, back of the throat (that’s where my husbands was) tonsils and or tongue. We met a young man (at Dana Farber Cancer Institute, during chemo therapy) who was only 24 never drank alcohol or smoked a cigarette in his life. He had tongue cancer and had to have a large portion of his tongue removed. Of course I don’t know what his personal sexual activity is/was but if he was sexually active with oral sex either male or female it would make sense that could be where he contracted his cancer from.
The other thing that is a mystery to me is if men and or women engage in anal sex, then why don’t they do more anal pap smear tests?
Recently I have been trying to get someone to do an anal pap smear due to concerns of rectal cancer (which btw it not dectected during a routine colonoscopy) and that a rectal pap smear is nearly unheard of. I was told the only physicians that are knowledgeable on that subject are proctologists. Which by the time you would be referred to them for rectal cancer, it would be way too late!