I would have to ask her to wait outside, because her self-stroking flow of valley garbage would kill my urge to live.
I love the house soooo fucking hard, though. I almost bought a similar (but much smaller) house in Savannah, but it was in a neighborhood experiencing a higher-than-average amount of crim and murrrder (which hasn’t ceased). 
That house had original pull-down bent wood lighting, terrazzo floors, metal-edged Formica counters, and the original Radarange still in the wall. Full wall of original sliders that slid smooov, and an Esther Williams pool in the wooded backyard. For under $200k. I hope the eventual owners loved it as hard as I did.
