Baliff: Now comes the case of CPD vs 84 year old woman
Judge: Let’s hear from the FOP Lawyer
FOP Lawyer: Your Honor, this 84 year old woman was required to wear prescription glasses while driving, yet when her body was found, she was not wearing them. Furthermore, when the glasses were eventually found they were broken and smashed. There was no way they could be worn that way. Obviously she was NOT wearing those glasses at the time of the incident.
Judge: Interesting.
FOP Lawyer: In addition, a search was done of the 84 year old woman’s apartment and a large number of various drugs were found. Lab tests are being done now to determine what they are. Also- a bottle of a green substance that looked like Marijuana was found in the spice cupboard of her kitchen. Obviously this woman has a drug problem and should not have been driving that night.
Judge: Alright, seize those drugs, the entire contents of her apartment and any Bank Accounts or other assets she had and we will hold them as evidence until we can determine what REALLY happened here.
Lawyer for 84 year old woman’s family: Your Honor, may we testify?
Judge: Were you there that night?
Lawyer for 84 year old woman’s family: No your Honor but…
Judge: than anything you have is just heresy. I am sealing this case for 40 years.
*Bangs Gavel *
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