I agree with most of what you said there apart from this bit:
That is the official theory. I don’t think it actually works that way (leaving aside whether it should).
I think for example for Germany, you could be as integrated into German culture and social life as you like but if you are visibly different, you will still not be considered fully ‘German’.
You may be accepted and completely welcome but for many people there will still be that undefined point which you can’t cross to become ‘German’.
You’re right though that if you do try and assimilate, you will probably be treated better than someone ‘white’ who doesn’t.
