Yeah just found myself thinking “shiiiit I’d take that…” One christmas my grandfather barricaded us in a bathroom and held everyone hostage until my aunt attacked him, caught his drunk ass off guard, and no one died. (I was an infant at the time so honestly I have forgotten what was used… a gun probably? Lord knows they were all fond of guns.) I think maybe some of the joy is captured on some old tapes my mother might have had hidden in her handbag but since they are likely in an outdoor shed in the hoarder hovel my father inhabits… everyone will be spared the fun. In my family that was a funny story! I only vaguely remember him later while he was still on par with my dad for drinking olympics, telling me at five how I was just going to grow up to be a whore and my soul was already damned to hell. I learned fast that getting old <> getting wise. He died in an armchair while I was in college. I didn’t come down to visit. My family literally at this point cannot be in the same room together unless lawyers and police are involved. If this is dysfunction god what a nice trip function must be!
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