This reminds me of the summary of the typical internet help thread:
OP: “Help! HELP! I’m stuck in a well!!!”
Users1-4: “Climb! Climb up and take our hands!”
OP: “I’m thinking I should dig… should I dig?”
User5: “NO! I was trapped in a well, and digging is a bad idea! Climb out!”
Users6-8: “Were lowering ropes! Take hold of a rope!”
User9: “I’ve even tied a harness to the end of this one!”
OP: “I can feel the ropes, but I don’t want to hold onto them… should I dig?”
User10: “No! If you dig, you’ll hit water, and then you’ll be proper hosed. I should know, I almost drowned.”
OP: “I dug a little bit just now, and I haven’t hit water. I’m gonna keep digging…”
Users11-18: “No! Climb! Climb out!”
OP: “Guys, I’m seriously stuck in this well! Help! HELP!!!”
User19: “I was trapped in a well once. It took me two years, but I managed to build a climbing machine that pulled me to safety out of a well bucket and a pocket watch. I’m dropping the blueprints, extra buckets, and an assortment of pocket watches.”
User20: “I’ve engineered a jet-pack that will rocket you to safety. Stay where you are and we’ll lower it down!”"
“OP: “Thanks for your help, guys. I’m gonna keep digging. I’ll find the Mines of Moria and I’ll just walk to the surface.”
Users1-20 piss in the well
User21: “Guys, seriously… stop peeing in the well.””
