10 things you’ll be surprised to learn about dinosaurs


Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/05/02/10-things-youll-be-surprise.html


Sometimes I feel like a dinosaur.



Says who?






Their net worth would amaze you too.



Compound interest still works for each one of them.
Seriously considering Labour, (but see above.)
Their girlfriend isn’t hungry (but they themselves change gender 4 times a year.)
Personal medicine records meticulously stored on fantastic long-lived media; tar.
Persistent belief in tablets that ‘remember’ what was in the ‘water’ splashed on them; until feathers in oxidized surface fall.
Prehistory of these animals split in twain by Cleveland-Detroit rift.
Gladiolas were too big for them and they just couldn’t deal.
Their gut bacteria were all Italian-Made.
Almost all could use the large integer Chi-Squares functions in Excel.
Smallest-to-largest lineups were common, and the recursion failure as they turned around was the most Epic. Thing. Ever. Animals with history-like RNAungal process] [erm… [erm…for DNA methylation ZALGOedit, IT C0MES record this process at their recurring peril.


But not right now?



No, not right now, but see me in the morning.


Dinosaur-shaped pancakes at your place in the morning?


I’m a bit rusty, but they’ll be great after we drown them in maple syrup.


Assuming “maple syrup” is code for whiskey, see you in the a.m.


I’ve always been curious as to why we don’t have, either now or in the recent past, land animals as big as the biggest dinosaurs were.


Whiskey maple syrup is a thing!


I’m sure this isn’t the full explanation, but cretaceous-era dinosaurs had a lot more oxygen to work with. Also a lot more warm, wet landscape to grow food and CO2 to grow it.


I’m a dinosaur right now!