I would like to dive around in that money like a porpoise. And burrow through it like a gopher. And toss it up and let it hit me on the head!
Though that first plunge is a doozy…it should be left to Big Operators only.
I vault upward, land squarely upon my springboard, arcing up, over, downward toward broken fingers, arms, dislocated shoulders & massive facial reconstruction.
It kind of makes me wonder if there’s anything that could theoretically be done to make it vaguely swimmable. Suspend the whole thing in gelatin, maybe?
“[the coins] were dumped in a public square, with no security, as an exercise in public trust”
Public trust changes inversely with the denomination of the currency. I could tell you that without spending $400,000.
This strikes me as a worthy idea regardless of whether it increases swimmability.
Blow a strong current of air through the whole thing from the bottom up. Not quite enough to get the coins flying around, but enough that when you land in them you don’t have to overcome static friction to get them to move out of the way.
I’m not sure if this would work, but it seems possible. We need to call the Mythbusters I think. Heck, I know where they can get a whole bunch of coins cheap (minus international shipping).
But if you want to make it ***~Art!~***, you need to use bodily fluids!
Call up the sperm banks, round up some plasma donors, and bid on that bull-shark fetus suspended in formaldehyde, because we’re about to explore the relationship between postmodern discourse and recycling culture wherin what starts out as contemplation soon becomes debased into a hegemony of lust, leaving only a sense of dread and the chance of a new beginning!
It’s nice to see that the website selling the Scrooge McDuck coin pool also has everything else our plutocratic overlords need, like a $4000 toothbrush.
I guess the original political statement they were making didn’t work out and now they are looking to sell to a fat cat.
Oh, those were the coins that were dumped as a publicity stunt to get attention for a referendum for basic income that they’ve managed to get put on the ballot in Switzerland.
Everyone would get 2500 Swiss Francs per month (About $2800 US). The idea being that if everyone has enough to live off of, they can decide to do what they want with their time. Something similar was tried in the 70’s in a town in Manitoba and it apparently worked pretty well.
I vault upward, land squarely upon my springboard, arcing up, over, downward toward
an insufficiently liquid asset.
It seems only hobbits and ducks can swim in gold. Maybe we can ask Peter Jackson or someone at Disney what the secret is?
Wait, if Bilbo weighs the same as a duck…
I’m still trying to figure out how Gollum could possibly be dense enough to sink in a pool of molten rock while a hunk of solid gold just sits on the surface until it melts.
The mistake may be expecting a book about wizards, fairies and ogres to be sensible in the first place.
I’m pretty sure that a wind strong enough to suspend fifteen tons of metal wouldn’t make the situation any safer. But I’m all for testing your idea! And any others. By God we’re going to make this happen somehow.
I’m hoping it will be kind of like a hovercraft, where the air pressure keeps the stuff in the air without having to go full gale force.