Hedge fund managers' sports car ownership predicts their unwise risk-taking


#1

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/12/22/hedge-fund-managers-sports-c.html


#2

Still, I’m going with the guy with car that has doors that go like this or this.


#3

I think you misspelled “predictable”.


#4

Of course, this is now going to become a metric, and hedge funds will offer incentives for their people to buy minivans instead of sport cars, ignoring that one is not the cause of the other, but they are instead both indicators of a propensity for risk-taking.


#5

Yeah, how is this not highly predictable? Or is that my anti- sports car bias showing?


#6

Honestly, if we can make a few of these bastards more miserable by depriving them of their cars then that’s something.


#7

Okay, if I understand the summation well enough, you have a chance at winning the cup, or to die in a horrific crash, but the minivan just might beat you by a nose? Did I read that right?


#8

Someone will make a killing trading in minivan futures. But presumably not the people who drive them.


#9

If owning one minivan makes people more likely to buy into my fund, then owning a thousand minivans…


#10

Oh, they’ll still buy the cars. But they will buy them through Cayman-registered shell corporations and store them in garages held under the corporations’ name. And then they’ll take the minivan, thank you very much.


#11

You’re looking at it entirely the wrong way; encourage the risk takers to take risks, point out to them how much faster and more glamorous motor bikes are, then just sit back and watch evolution in action.
(Oh, and get them signed up as organ donors first)


#12

But, but, Homo Economicus is above such ‘behavioral economics’ voodoo. This ‘study’ is absurd to reason and dangerous to faith.


#13

I had an acquaintance once who swore up and down that he made his investment fortune by tracking high-performance car crashes versus shorting over real estate investment trusts. His logic was that car crashes indicated a regional market was getting too hot, the people who actually increased business value were cashing out and “buying too much accomplishment car,” and that a retraction would be happening soon. I guess it worked for him; he seemed to have a new BMW every year.


#14

You won’t believe what happens next!


#15

We all know the syllogism that this new information creates (at least regarding male hedge fund managers)…

Small penis size predicts unwise risk-taking!!!

(I recommend bringing a ruler to all meetings with your fund management team from now on…)


#16

I can think of much better way to deprive them of their flash cars.

It involves tumbrels.


#17

The target demographic for new luxury sport cars is hilarious academically interesting.

Balding, middle-aged men who drive slow. I am totally not kidding.

The average Porsche buyer, for example, was age 48 in 2007 and 51 in 2012.

The usually accepted theory is that young people either don’t have money, or if they do have money, they don’t need expensive sports cars to get dates. And that the pretty girls and/or guys don’t get a chance to see you at the wheel if you drive fast… so it would seem that buying a new luxury sports car signals high probability of midlife crisis and/or recent divorce. Just the characters you want managing your portfolio risk, eh?


#18

What if they drive a Honda Fit?

Okay, but what if they drive a Honda Fit Sport?


#19

Thank you for the new English word.


#20

This trope is often considered to be like some law of nature, but has it ever occurred to anyone that some folks might just like sports cars per se, without any reference to their other equipment?

Mind you, maybe I’d be able to afford a sports car if I wasn’t satisfied with nature’s gifts…