Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2023/07/04/is-chatgpt-better-for-telemarketing-or-for-infuriating-telemarketers.html
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Annoying Man lives, he lives!
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I find it faster and easier to just hang up.
Google does a pretty good job at filtering them out, so I don’t get that many in the first place.
I mean, I get it. They’re annoying. They waste your time.
But I’m not going to waste more of my time setting up bots to deal with them. Just… hang up. You don’t have to say anything to them at all. Just hang up.
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Bots talking to bots…
There is a little story by Ephraim Kishon about two friends. When they discover that they both bought one of those newfangled chess computers they let the computers play each other and use their newly found free time to go out for a couple of beers.
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They are, up to a point: they all start with a tell-tale “boop?”, then a truncated “hell–?” Then it launches into its spiel, “hi this is Medicare services…” Once you give it enough sensical answers, it connects to a human operative.
And then the vuvuzela comes out.
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Odd. I’ve been trying to reach you to talk to you about our extended Vuvuzela guarantee.
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Well, that wasn’t very impressive.
Although simply calling any male telemarketer “Patricia” incessantly sounds like fun.
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Maybe the ChatGPT telemarketers and the ChatGPT-to-a-telemarketer companies can just get adjacent racks in the datacenter so they can talk to each other all day long without wasting bandwidth on the internet.
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The point isn’t so much to save yourself time, but to waste the telemarketer’s time, and hopefully even to prevent them from scamming somebody else if they’re busy chatting with a bot.
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Now I want to hook ChatGPT into Teams and have it join our work meetings. Our schedules are increasingly filling up with (more) meetings while we could be, y’know doing stuff. I think this is a good way to push back. Only how do I get it to join without it showing up as myself? Perhaps as a dial-in guest.
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If you figure out how to do that, let us know. This should be an innovation whose value to humanity will be comparable to that of the wheel, or movable type. A Nobel prize for sure.
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Ah yes, chatgpt talking to and learning from chatgpt. This will end well when the hyper intelligent chat bot finds out there never really was cruise ship tickets.
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Occasionally I’ll talk to one of these phone spammers to waste their time and they tend to get very annoyed (and sweary) when they eventually realise.
Critically, the more people who waste the telemarketers’ scammers’ time, the less profitable the whole operation becomes.
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I am astonished that telemarketing has any effectiveness at all in this day and age. If you’re calling me to sell something I am automatically not interested. Even in the unlikely event that the product is something I might want.
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When a telemarketer/opinion pollster/… phones me I usually say something along the lines of “Hey, it’s great that you’re calling! I’m with the University of … and we’re conducting a survey on working conditions in telemarketing. Would you be prepared to answer a few questions? It will only take five minutes or so.” At that point they normally hang up very abruptly. Such rude uncooperativeness. How will I ever finish my research?? 
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Question 1: Would you say your mother is proud of you?
Question 2: On a scale of 1 to 10, how well do you handle the fact that society loathes you?
Question 3: What drugs to you take to soothe your conscience?
Question 3a: If none, when did you first become a member of the GOP?
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it takes a good person with chat gpt llms to stop - - -
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