At the opera, there is no question that a clear distinction is made between Brava! and Bravo!
I knew I was going to be sorry for replying! 
You mean, because you didnât get to have the last word on the subject?
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I assume you donât have children of your own. My daughter is seven and she complains all the time that action cartoons and many imaginative toys have far more male than female characters. She notices things that her parents donât: for example being bothered by the fact that the X-Men are not all men. Itâs definitely not a case of spoon-feeding. Perhaps itâs comforting to you to assume that girls arenât actually affected by these things, but I can assure you that some of them are.
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Except in this case we used to be able to buy it and no longer can. These girls have mothers and aunts who are Lego fans. They know theyâre being shortchanged.
And boys can afford to move on to something else. Itâs called privilege.
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That is indeed a factor (the peer pressure aspect), but I can only speak of my own experience, and Iâve noted a lot of preferences that she had or developed prior to her ever having had a âpeerâ group as sheâs only 3. Frankly, both her mother and I were a bit dismayed by how much âpink crapâ was accumulating in our house (because people give you pink things when you have a little girl), and tried to counter it with other âless girlyâ things: A primarily red and black âdia de los muertosâ blanket, deep rich purples and blues, etc⌠You know what my kid repeatedly picks regardless of whatâs offered? Pink crap. Or lavender crap, or anything really shiny/reflective. Basically anything in a pastel hue or thatâs shiny/garish. As before, this is all from before a time when she had a peer group (only this year with preschool), and itâs exactly opposite what our wishes would have been (weâre more darker/subdued colors/hues people ourselves).
Iâll agree that âpinkâ is not necessarily inherent, but her preferences for colors that society codes as âlittle girlâ colors certainly was (much to our chagrin), and definitely did not come from a âpeer groupâ.
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I think the situation may be that many little kids enjoy shiny, over-the-top things. Iâve known several little boys who loved sparkly things but it got stamped out of them extremely quickly.
My nephewâs favourite colour is purple and he often wore his sisterâs fancy dresses to daycare. His last Halloween costume was a purple/black/sequins bat⌠fairyâŚthingy (not sure what it was, but it rocked). His parents are fine with it but I think another reason he was able to carry on was that, until last month, they had been living in South Korea since his birth.
Whenever Koreans saw the big tall blonde kid, it was striking and unusual anyway. Him walking around in a sparkly dress didnât make him seem that much more âout-of-normâ than he already was. I have a sad suspicion that heâs going to encounter more issues about it now that heâs in the USA (he hasnât started his new school there yet). Heâs not âspecialâ on this side of the Pacific: Heâll be expected to fit-in.
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I see your point, however itâs not their toy preferences that are being forced here. Itâs their identity preferences.
Itâs about what identity they even get to choose, and why they should need to choose it while children, when playing,
How about just selling pink âgirlyâ sets, without marketing or labeling them as âfor girlsâ, just âfor kidsâ?
So that way play is independent from gender? Because you are right that there are probably âinherent gender based tendencies in terms of type of play and preferred color paletteâ, however, what is gained by labeling such sets with what that preference is to be called? pink and soft robot pet building for girls, and edgy space robot building for boys. How about just robot pet sets, and space robot sets, for ALL?
What kids like is not inherently a statement of their gender, they just like it. Why label things as âfor boysâ or âfor girlsâ at all? So the kids know? The kids know if they want pink legos.
Any drive to label their toys with gender so that WE can feel secure about their identity⌠is irrelevant to what they want to play with.
If youâre a six-year-old boy who likes pink, and every other boy you know sneers at you for liking pink, pretty soon youâre going to decide that you donât actually like pink all that much.
Yes, because âpinkâ is for âgirlsâ. Just like Lego says, on the box. Thanks Lego, for telling the bullies something new to pick on the different kids for! And thanks Bobo, for the casual victim blaming.
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No it doesnât. It says âFriends.â
Yes, it does say that. Look at all the boys and girls on those boxes.
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Speaking as someone who has had a: long hair, and b: stupid, white-boy dreadlocks, donât be so sureâŚ
So your point is what? That Lego shouldnât put girls on their boxes? Or that Lego is responsible for centuries of inherited acculturation against boys playing with female figures?
or⌠that lego didnât have to perpetuate it, and nether did you.
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Me? What did I do?
I dunno about multiple drafts, but my six-year-old daughter could have written this letter (in slightly better penmanship) with the same absence of spelling mistakes. Sheâs no advanced genius, just a first-grader in a public school who learned to read at three (as I did) and happens to enjoy reading and writing enough to practice it.
This may be a tad more advanced than you might expect from grade-level in your area, but itâs neither the work of some freakish savant nor is it likely fake. Itâs just an admirable note from a clever and passionate girl who knows how to express herself.
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Yeah, well my one year old son could eat this letter.
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You got me there. Mine wouldâve turned up his nose if it wasnât served with American cheese.
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True true. The wee ones do seem to like all manner of sparkly and shiny regardless of gender. And I do agree that, unfortunately, cultural gender ânormsâ get rather forcefully enforced at some point in a childâs life. My point wasnât to disagree that society, again, unfortunately, shoe horns people into expected roles, but to note that kids (or at least mine) definitely has her own strong willed ideas about what colors etc⌠are acceptable, and these more often than not mesh with what society would expect for her anatomy.
That being said, sheâs 3, and kind of pissed that I wonât let her use the bandsaw or other power tools yet. Maybe Iâll get lucky and end up with a cool little maker-child 
.
Aside from presenting a false dichotomy for unknown reasons?
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Iâm completely with you on the idea of making non-gender marketed sets of differing color palettes and activities without specifying who should be playing with them.
I do like the idea of space robot sets for all, but why not pink space adventure robot sets (for boys and girls who happen to prefer pink?). âadventureâ doesnât necessarily have to be associated with the color palette generally associated with âboysâ, and the (absolutely horrible IMHO) âletâs go shopping at the mallâ toys donât necessarily need to come only in garish pastel hues.
And thanks for the accusation of âcasual victim blamingâ, when my entire point was simply to note that my experience has been that my little girl (again, much to our chagrin) seems to fit neatly in the box of what color preferences she would be expected to have for her anatomical gender. Actually, I have no idea where you got the quote about boys sneering at other boys, because it certainly didnât come from anything I posted. So perhaps a bit of disingenuous editing/implying that someone elseâs words are mine to justify your worldview? Or perhaps a bit of misdirected anger at something posted by some entirely different user?
