So, this is one-half rant, one-half advice solicitation. [EDIT: I lied; the rant is actually significantly longer than the solicitation for advice.]The long and short of it is, I’m exhausted, and I don’t have the time that I need to accomplish the things that I need to accomplish.
Personal background: I’m working while trying to attend school. On no planet (or actually, on this planet, maybe, just not this country) can I afford school without students loans and grants, but work still makes up a significant shortfall in my finances. In other words, I cannot simply decide not to work. I’ve reduced my hours to as low as they can go before I basically don’t work there, but it does hurt the pocketbook and may not be sustainable long term. Meanwhile I’m attempting 15 credit hours. This ideally translates to 45 hours of work for school, a week. Added to my work obligations for a recent week and transit times that brings me to a total of 5 hours free per day to do other things-- if I’m averaging four hours of sleep a night.
What I’m finding is that I’m being slowly, gradually, crushed beneath the weight of it all. I’m keeping up with things so far, but barely. It’s not like my program isn’t challenging, either. The problem is that I don’t have enough time in which to get things done. I’ve pretty much been working (school work or monetary work) non-stop for three weeks. I’m averaging four hours of sleep a night, with much of that being one or two hours added up to full nights’ sleep to get the average. I’m eating terribly, I get very little social time (at this point, it’s limited to what I say here and mumbling goodnight to housemates on the way to bed.)
I count every minute and live and die by the clock. five minutes during lunch is enough to complete the end of this or that assignment, fifteen minute breaks at work are good for completing a book problem if someone doesn’t try to talk to me. I’ve taken to memorizing homework problems so I can try working them out in my head at work to save time. I have video games, hobbies, friends: None of which I’m engaging with. I admit to falling prey to procrastination from time to time, but this has not been issue. I’ve literally, almost counter-intuitively been too busy to put things off.
All of this is incredibly maddening. Tonight, I’m basically just using this time that I really can’t spare to gripe, because it’s probably going to keep me sane. I need sanity more than I need that time.
My Question Is: How do people do this? I’ve long ago given up the ghost of the idea that I’m a special person whose problems are unique. I know I’m not the only person who works and goes to school simultaneously. I also know, discouragingly, that I’m statistically disadvantaged, and starting to see why. I’m literally too exhausted to explain why I find that genuinely funny enough to set off maniacal laughter on my part.
So, to reiterate: How do people find the time and money to do this? In genuinely have no clue. My parents aren’t an option. In many respects, my situation could be a lot worse. At least I’m not homeless.