This Christmas elf is selling fast because of its suggestive tongue


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/11/17/this-christmas-elf-is-selling.html


#2

suggestive tongue

Google that, and boy be prepared for what shows up.


#3

wakes up, blearily reaches for the phone to see what fresh hell awaits

“Hey rob do you have anything to do with this cunnilingus elf in Britain”

hurls phone into space


What is your Band Name, Rapper Name, Album Name
#4

Good, I need something to replace my worn out Harry Potter broomstick.


#5

There, there. Just blaze up your pot advent calendar and go back to sleep.


#6

This is Hermey the elf’s cousin Lewis, who wanted to be a gynecologist…or politician…or movie producer…etc.


#7

Careful! The NSA’s Elf on the Shelf is watching.


#8

“I would prefer not to.”


#9

“…with sales reaching a climax…”

I see what they did there.


#10

You know you’re responsible for this…


#11

um, ok then.


#12

There is no way I’m getting jiggy with Jeff Sessions… Nope.


#13

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