If you are drinking a gallon or two per day of sugar water, especially if not exercising hard, your metabolism and food intake are going to be seriously messed up. Studies on hydration never seem to take any account of sugar crash. Scientific reductionism.
Wow. I have to wonder how many takes were needed for everyone to get through that with a straight face! 
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That so reminds me of a traveling salesperson who stopped at the house that three school friends and I shared for a time when we first moved out here. The guy was peddling some all-purpose spray cleaner. His spiel: “It’s safe! It’s non-toxic! It’s bio-degradable!”, punctuated at the end with he spraying the stuff into his mouth. (!!!) A “No, thank you” sent him on his way.
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to be fair, from same article:
this isn’t to say cow’s milk, which takes about 100 litres of water to produce 100ml of milk, is more environmentally friendly
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True,
But water isn’t distributed equally. In California, it’s in epecially short supply.
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The guardians article contains these lines.
this isn’t to say cow’s milk, which takes about 100 litres of water to produce 100ml of milk, is more environmentally friendly
It takes 1.1 gallons (5 litres) of water to grow one almond
The obvious question is raised-- how many almonds are proccesd into 100 ml of milk?
The BBC offers better answers:
200 ml of almond milk requires 80 L of water (and, if the guardian is correct, contains 16 almonds)
200 ml of dairy milk requires 120 L of water.
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On the one hand, very interesting and certainly makes me feel better about my habit of drinking lemonade or orange juice or whatever after I’ve been biking even though I drank water the whole time - on the other, I’ll stick to water for most of my beverage needs since my explicit goal is for it to go right through me (visiting the bathroom more often is worth it to avoid future kidney stones!)
I think that’s worth remembering about something like this - “hydrating” is not necessarily the healthiest or most important thing to try to do at all times!
Probably isn’t really worth thinking about at all unless it’s hot, you are exercising a lot, you are elderly, you have a neurological issue, you are likely to form kidney stones or some other kidney issue, you’re high on ecstasy or you have diarrhea (or some combination of those - mix and match if you need a very strange creative writing prompt!).
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Polyethylene glycol works pretty well for a flush, though I wouldn’t recommend it before running a marathon.
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Maybe it’s almonds that aren’t distributed equally. Where is Johnny Almondseed when we need him?
I was just thinking about that! The nontoxic cleaner sales guy who sprayed it his mouth used to come around years ago, but I haven’t seen that schtick in a long time. I wonder if drinking a bottle of the stuff over the course of a day wasn’t as nontoxic as they thought.
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That’s a valid concern… and any alert thoughts re the stuff’s toxicity could have been impaired by the stuff itself; a drinker’s ability to consider the effects of continual use would have been staunched. How Machiavellian of the maker! 
The soil and climate in california are ideal for almond farming-- with the one exception that there isn’t enough water.
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Because why not:
Lime daiquiris. I can confirm they are good for you, as I’ve never had scurvy.
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