Why is your millenial crying? A guide for parents and other concerned parties, by Gemma Correll

[Permalink]

4 Likes

I’m just going to put this out there: Stumptown is the most overrated coffee ever. Portland Roasting is where it’s at.

3 Likes

Regarding the whole “Everybody Gets a Trophy” thing, you need to remember that Millennials were children and never asked to get a trophy just for showing up. It was the Boomer parents of these Millennials who invented the whole “Everybody Gets a Trophy” thing.

Fucking Baby Boomers and their narcissism.

42 Likes

er I think that would be the Boomer’s children’s children.

Sadly I think it is my generation and the one after that has forgotten that lifes highs are so much better when compared to the lows and are afraid to let kids fail.

3 Likes

It’s not simply a matter of comparison and making your warm fuzzies fuzzier, either. Failing is a learning experience. It’s how you ascertain and address your weaknesses and grow stronger. Groundless praise, (or simply praising the product, rather than the work put into it), both generates complacency and ill-prepares the students for times in the future when they inevitably WILL fail.

Still, self-esteem is important, especially for kids living in environments that devalue them, or belonging to demographic groups which are systematically devalued. What seems to be important, at least according to recentish studies, is to praise student’s work, rather than the product (unless the product is genuinely A+ praiseworthy). Students then associate praise with the effort put into the task, rather than with wrapping it up and crapping out something ‘good enough.’

5 Likes

The only way it could be the Boomer’s children’s children is if the family always has kids at 15-16 and the Boomers are from early in the generation (1946+16+16 is 1978).

1 Like

The thing about failure today is that for most people, failure is not a real option. If you fail, you often don’t get a second chance. And then you have a permanent mark of failure on your CV that can really screw you over because jobs are still scarce - and those unpaid internships are also scarce, and very competitive - and there’s usually another person who didn’t have that failure (or was willing to lie outright about it).

So not only were we not brought up to handle failure well (though I’ll say I have in fact learned a lot from my failures), but the older generations have also given us a world where failure is often pretty much permanent. Of course, older people are affected by that too - all the older people who lost their decent-paying job after years or decades through no fault of their own (hard to even call that failure, but that’s what it’s seen as) and never found something remotely as good (if they found another job at all) can speak to that.

8 Likes

As a Gen-Xer, I feel like my generation was written off as a loss a long time ago, and that we’ve spent our lives with ever declining resources, trying to hold things together long enough for the millenials to have a chance to survive.

34 Likes

And it ticks me off when people bash millenials.

19 Likes

Speaking as a Gen-Xer with no kids, I think the oft-ridiculed Millenials have been handed a shit sandwich.

34 Likes

Er right - Boomer’s children. I got carried away with the children. Not in an unmarked van sort of way…

6 Likes

It does have things both ways a bit, but I’m not sure the intent of that comic was to bash millennials.

2 Likes

No, it was clearly mocking the way Millenials are routinely mocked, pointing out they’ve got serious problems.

14 Likes

Also there seems to be a certain group of people who when they need cheap labor like to say you have too much self-esteem and deserve no inherent respect, and that if you wish any in future you’ll have to earn it. However, when they want to make a moral judgement about you they tell you your problem is you have no self-respect.

14 Likes

Introducing Matt Walsh, champion douchenozzle.

EDIT:
That’s Walsh’s preface to his article, on why he’s opposed to $15/hour wages for fast-food workers. Here’s a direct link.

1 Like

He seems to have no problem making pronouncements on what people at the low end “deserve to earn,” but he’ll find all kinds of objections to anyone saying the same about athletes, CEOs, and other high end earners.

10 Likes

Let me tell a story.

I graduated in 2012, with very little debt, thank Christ. Nonetheless I couldn’t find a job in my field, and for that mater only had two or three interviews in my first year out of school. I end up taking a job with a retail franchise opening a new store. The owner promised me full time work, well, once I start I end up getting the same hours as high school kids doing the same stock job as me; some guy the owner knew ended up with the full-time version of the job, and while my hours would inevitably creep upward as the manager liked my work, the owner would demand “fairness” in hours and the other part timers would end up taking my extra shifts.

Fast forwarding a couple months, and the guy he knew ended up fired, since it turned out he didn’t particularly see the need to show up for shifts. I get the job I’d been offered initially, and by Christmas am a keyholding supervisor. Still only making $0.50 over minimum wage mind, but at least it’s full time. At this point I go back to school part time since whatever this is, it’s not a career. By late summer, about a year after I’m hired the owner is talking about having me do some shifts at another store he owns to train the staff there.

Around the same time the corporate office for the franchisor posts some district manager jobs. No, I don’t have as much time in retail as most of their DMs, but most of what I have is in the company, and I have a reasonably relevant degree, which a lot of their people don’t, so I apply. A couple of weeks later I show up for work and am kicked off the property. No explanation given, and I quote “no, there’s no explanation, things just didn’t work out”. From what investigation I’ve done it seems that the corporate office determined I was somehow lacking in loyalty by virtue of wanting to work for corporate and demanded I be fired.

The guy also screws with my EI; I ask him to list the dismissal as a layoff “no, that’s not how it happened” and everything gets delayed since the idiot case worker wouldn’t take my word that it was without cause and decided to play phone tag with the store. To add insult to all of this, the guy screws me out of $150, having conveniently lost the agreement to pay for the first aid course he’d been ordered to send supervisors on. Of course I could sue for that, but $150 isn’t going to cover courts costs even in small claims, and I’d be trying to enforce a verbal agreement anyway.

So at this point every damn employer I go to has asked, as they’re first fucking question, why I left that job. Any but for one place that hired me for a SHORT seasonal, and still retail,l contract they’ve pretty much all shoe’d me out the door as soon as they hear anything about a dismissal. I’ve talked to an employment councillor, who’s advice amounted to saying I should forget about my field since I’ve got a years experience in retail, and that I shouldn’t bother looking for full-time anything since that’s “not how things are done nowadays”. This same employment advisor was of the opinion I should stop volunteering with a couple local politicians since that “isn’t going to get you a job” - a week before I got the only other full time contract I’ve had since I was fired, with one of those politicians. I haven’t been back.

tl;dr worked in retail for a year, promoted quickly. Fired because looking for internal promotion scared them somehow. Other stores scared off by that. Employment advisor thinks retail is my “most realistic option” and that I shouldn’t even bother to look for full time work.

Apparently all it takes to get counted out more or less permanently for just about any gainful employment ever is bad luck.

22 Likes

Er? My mother was born in 1952. I was born in 71. My daughter (who is in college) was born in 96. She’s 19.

3 Likes

I graduated in 2008 with a B.S. in a non-BS field (geology) from a top-ranked private east coast university. I went to grad school immediately afterwards (at a not-as-good school, a poor choice on my part, chosen for the wrong reasons but I didn’t know at the time) and ended up not finishing because my thesis advisor is an asshole (in 20 years at the school he has never had a grad student he was advising actually graduate… obviously didn’t know that before signing up). There’s my big failure.

I’ve had a handful of job interviews, and one polite decline letter from a PhD program, after hundreds of job applications and several grad school applications. Mostly just silence. It’s going to take someone consciously deciding to give me a huge break and that seems unlikely if not impossible (I’m not well-connected although it seems like I should be).

Of course - in hindsight I recognize that I missed the huge opportunity that was North Dakota oil. If I had done that back in 2008 I’d be rich right now. If I had done that in 2011 after giving up on grad school I’d be almost rich at least. Now that I am willing to do that (there are many personal reasons I’m extremely wary of it - and I didn’t go into geology for the money, I’ll leave it at that) because there isn’t much hope elsewhere, naturally that option dries up.

So yeah - one instance of bad luck is enough to ruin millennials. Has this ever been true quite so starkly, in modern times?

To be honest… I retain hope. I recognize that even long-term unemployed I am in an extremely privileged position, and my prospects are way better than for many, and I will get a decent job eventually. Still sucks though and will massively affect my lifetime earnings, and my prospects for owning a house and all that (as referenced in the comic).

5 Likes

“You don’t deserve a trophy just for showing up!”

“90% of Success is just showing up.”

7 Likes