Award-winning duck eats yeast, explodes, and blinds a man

boing
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The olden times were full of terrible dangers.

If an exploding duck didn’t get you . . .

clown_death_2

clowndeath

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Duck Duck Boom.

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Freemasons consider Rhadamanthus to be the same as Osiris. Osiris and Nebuchadnezzar both appear in Mackey’s Encyclopedia of Freemasonry and its Kindred Sciences.

(ETA a link.)

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The biggest red flag for me in that legend was always that this guy leaves pans of yeast around on the floor for some reason? The entire story hinges on that nonsensical behavior. You can picture the writer racking their brain, trying to come up with a plot contrivance to get yeast into a bird because people know what yeast does in bread, ergo the story will be plausible. Apparently that was the best they could do?

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No way you can get that big of a ducksplosion from yeast alone. This was a duck desperately trying to attract attention.

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Hm, no mention of ducks.

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51pqzJ8rAUL.SY445

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The biggest red flag for me is that you simply can’t build up that much pressure inside an animal’s internal organs before they just rupture and kill the animal.

You wouldn’t get a “boom,” you’d get “the glutton from SE7EN.”

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It is one in the All-Seeing-Eye for Masonic Symbolism.

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I was going to say it read like a Futility Closet preview.

Probably would make a good puzzler.

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this was planned terrorism no doubt about it . now that there has been one successfully executed duck attack we can expect more in more in the coming year. the perpetrators of this attack will become bolder and more sophisticated in they’re devised plans . According to Dr. Jamie Lannister at the Nina Hartley institute of avian weaponization, we can expect this to escalate to the possible use of turkeys, geese and possibly peacocks, ultimately we may even see attacks with ostriches and emus, but the largest birds may not be the biggest threat according to Lannister. who says the most effective of these attacks will involve large numbers of the cutest and most adorable species of avians such as kiwis, penguins and blue footed boobies. one thing is certain the public must be vigilant and anytime we see an obese bird aproach yell…DUCK!

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If it was possible then the French would already have invented self-spreading foie gras.

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Not to mention that the guy happened to bend down close to it at the exact moment it exploded, and one of the few elements in a duck capable of puncturing an eye (bone? bill?) happened to hit him right in the eye?

I think we can say this story is composed entirely of red flags.

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I’ve seen this before; molecular gastronomy gone mortally wrong. How many more brilliant chefs, riding the slivered, gleaming edge of the possible, must we lose in search of a recipe for yeasted-duck?

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What will you say?

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This has the same feel and flavor of any great tall tale from that era. Story tellers and yarn spinners were a thing, prior to the advent of radio, television, and the internet. (Mutters in Grandpa Simpson-ese and wanders off slowly)

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clew [ sic ]

I don’t think that is a sic in that it is an error - that was just an alternative spelling at one point.

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I heard its bigger than that! Bigger than Ducks!* Its feckin’ Geese, man! Geese, I tell yay! Exploding fecking Geese!

*Dungeon Dudes: Shadows of Drakkenheim reference

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I was referring to the original story published in the St. Louis paper. I neither think you a Mason nor a moron.

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Yes, but they would have used thin mints instead of yeast;

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