Denmark's largest bank laundered €200B through its Estonian branch, ignoring glaring warning signs

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/09/19/something-is-rotten.html

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“Now, under the bank’s Know Your Customer policy, I’m required to ask you a few questions. First of all, what is it that you do?”

“I’m a money launderer.”

“Excellent. And what will you be using this account for?”

“Laundering money.”

“I see. Will this money be coming primarily from (a) drug sales, (b) arms sales, ( c) profits of miscellaneous criminal activity such as racketeering, extortion, exploitation of prostitution, etc., or (d) looting of national assets?”

“Uh … a bit of all four, to be honest. Do you need exact numbers?”

“No, no, this is just to get a general idea. I’ll just put down ‘Other’, and we can get into more detail later if necessary. It’s really just a formality, to help us decide what other services we can offer you. For instance, we have a real estate investment service that’s very popular with some of our drug money customers. I can find you a brochure if you’re interested.”

“That does sound like it might be … useful.”

“Splendid. Well, that completes our questions. Welcome to Danske Bank. We’re delighted to have you as a customer.”

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Hey, he’s “stepped down”. I’m sure that’s punishment enough.

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So the takeaway here is that when you successfully launder €200bn of dirty murder money, you only pay €6B in fines? And nobody goes to jail for being complicit in the aiding / abetting of the worst criminal acts?

The fines should be levied at a 1:1 ratio - with jail sentences mandated for everyone complicit. Anything else is a travesty - esp. in a country that so many look up to like Denmark.

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But… they’re rich. They don’t do consequences.

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I’d suggest higher than 1:1, to make sure society is still made whole if damages are under estimated and because if it is only 1:1, some percent of companies won’t get caught, making this a still statistically profitable business.

And mandatory liquidation of companies with particularly eggregious or repeating violations.

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If the CEO steps down, that doesn’t immunize him against criminal charges, but it probably makes him much harder to sue, poor guy.

Stepping down so he has more time to enjoy the money he’s made.

It is worth noting that when Thomas Borgen stepped down because of his “incompetence”, he received a golden handshake of a measly $2 million. How sad he must be.

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I was asleep at the brain-wheel. Agreed: a much greater than 1:1 fine should be levied for laundering blood money.

The banksters - in addition to stiff jail sentences - should also receive a vicious kick to the genitals.

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