Didn’t I drive by this last night and wasn’t it eerie even though I know it’s there?
Who doesn’t love some bespoke hand crafted artisanal Star Wars for its deeper authenticity?
Neat or neat-o?
?
…did I sleep walk last night, or did someone else put a bottle of shampoo on my desk while I was asleep?
Did you was stoned?
No, but have you ever sleepwalked? (Twice for me, maybe a third time last night) Wanna hear about weird shit you do when it happens?
Ever cooked a meal and then left it uneaten, awaiting discovery?
Or, as an unwakeable child, asked your parents what all the other people in the house are doing, y’know, the other people?
Ever somehow unlocked the car without the keys, gotten in, closed and locked the doors and woken up, with hands on the wheel, from a dream that you were driving to the shops?
Don’t I want your stories too?
Ever peed in a cat box?
Ever stomped around a hotel in your underoos, taking elevators, finding service stairs, and denying you were asleep the entire time?
Should I add stealing shampoo to my list?
Ever worked as Night staff in a hotel and thought you saw a weird shadow out the corner of your eye and followed the weird noises that always seem to be just around the next corner, down the next dimly lit corridor, only to eventually find a mostly naked fellow standing in a linen closet ‘waiting for the elevator to get the right floor’, and then chaperoned said sleepwalking guest back to their room, and kept an eye on their floor over the cameras for the rest of the night?
Maybe this happens more than I thought?
But please, how did the cat box thing go down!?
Were you standing in it, leg cocked over your head?
Holy shit did you work in hotel in York!? Was that me?
But the cat box? Yeah, didnt I mark that territory well? (We threw it away and the cats scowled at me from then on)
LOL no, wasn’t that Glasgow?
Still staying with those nice folks with the orange tree?
Maybe they had some extra shampoo?
What did Julie Delpy say?
Something about it being easier in Hollywood to be African American than a woman?
Ugh… Why do I even ask? Isn’t that tone deaf? Don’t I think that hollywood’s misogyny doesn’t get its racism a pass?
Did you know that ballet can be humorous?
?
Have you seen the influx of racists in the Arizona HS thread? WTF?
#No…
*rubs hands together
…I mean, not yet?
Won’t I assume that most of them wil be swallowed up rather soon, so get there for active mock-ti-vism while you can?
?