Are they handing those out now? Don’t you need to get on the list first?
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What list? Why did no one tell me about a list? 
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Did I finally get the badge? Yes I did! Who’s a good rat?
Oh wait, this isn’t a good thing, is it?
And why does it say I got it at 3 am, when I was fast asleep for hours?
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Is it irony that I liked something that requires you being out of likes?
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The thing is, I’m not actually out of likes, am I?
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Who can keep track of all the new badges?
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Badges?
Who needs ‘no stinking badges’ anyway?
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Guess whos april fools involved their ISPs router dying and requiring a week long replacement delivery?
Not RVD but me, doncherknow?
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Do they require you to use theirs?
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Not sure it’s absolutely required but its free if I wait or… however much a router is if I’m impatient… and they preconfigure it for you and haven’t I heard BT is a nightmare to set up manually? Funnily enough, hadn’t my contract ‘just run out’ and wasn’t I offered a free upgrade if I renewed? If it’s some kind of corporate april fools doesnt that make my paranoia senses tingly?
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Did anyone else get fooled on this oneth of April?
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They don’t charge a fee? Did you know every provider I’ve dealt with charges a fee that makes buying your own pay for itself, usually in less than a year?
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No, but is it cruel of me to go on Facebook and for every status where people say they’re not going to believe people say something like “I think you’re great!”?
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Yeah, that was what piqued my paranoia, there would normally be a fee but because they wanted me to renew my contract it was waived… see what I mean? Wasn’t it the unsurprised and almost rehearsed spiel I got from two different agents what made me wonder if it’s an up selling tactic?
Didn’t I just realise I’m going to have to avoid the gif bank for a week!? What’ll I doooooo?
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Why am I having such difficulty lately differentiating sarcasm and satire from reality? Have I become uncalibrated?
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Hasn’t reality gotten a little too surreal lately?
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Am I starting to think that somehow I took the blue pill and the red pill together, along with a couple of tabs of bad acid?
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