Clearly ahead of his time again, he’s getting out on top with signals of demise on the horizon.
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“You’ve got to be kidding me”, said Satan when asked for comment. “I’ve barely got enough resources here as it is. And Koch’s the kind of git that really sucks up resources.”
“I mean, sure, I’ve got almost limitless flames of damnation. And I can fill his underwear with fire ants daily, forever. But it’s the staff. Koch’s the kind of arsehole who arrives, takes one look, and then decides to start a hostile takeover. So you’ve got to rotate the demons regularly - no more than an hour at a time, and plenty of other damned souls between their shifts with him. Otherwise he’ll put ideas in their heads - and you really don’t want that.”
“The plus side is that you can temporarily hide the problem by making it an event - a big party for the demons, with a Koch Pinata as the centrepiece. So the demons never have a chance to hear him speak. Hopefully we can break his spirit quickly, get any nasty ideas out of his head and settle down for a nice cosy eternity of punishment.”
“Still, it presents a tricky problem for staffing. I’m going to have to take the demons off someone - and it feels much too early for Nixon. He needs at least another decade of special treatment.”
“I might use the ones who are working on Steve Bannon.”
“Well, yes, technically he’s alive. But have you seen him? It really can’t be long. He looks half dead already, so I figured I’d just assign some demons anyway. They’re over there on that hill of skulls, practising on that putrefying pig carcass. At least, I think it’s a carcass. Are you sure Steve’s not dead?”
“Anyway, I’d better get on this. Have you seen world politics? It’s probably going to get worse before it gets better…”
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“I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.” —Clarence Darrow
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“'My mother told me never to speak badly of the dead. He’s dead… Good.”
-Bette Davis (paraphrased)
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Will Trump give him a state funeral?
He is survived by his money, influence, and a legacy of disastrous inaction on environmental issues.
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Koch was far richer and more successful than Trump, so probably not.
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I’m alive.
-Paraphrased from Arthur Scargill’s statement on Margaret Thatcher’s death.
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More like disastrous negative actions on climate change, such as working to destroy any organization that might possibly take steps to mitigate it.
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Decades too late to do any good
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Ding, Dong…
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All men have an emotion to kill; when they strongly dislike some one they involuntarily wish he was dead. I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.
– Clarence Darrow, The Story of My Life
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One down…
I do not feel the slightest remorse about expressing that sentiment. The survival of the planet is at stake.
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