Hover-parenting a response to judging one another, not danger to kids

Dude… I get this is a touchy subject for you, but I really don’t think @popobawa4u was lecturing you or being sarcastic or anything other than honestly curious.


I’m sorry, but

Do you worry that the same person will strike again?

But that’s a Tibetan sand fox.

ETAx2: Oh. Maybe I get it.*

(* I do not get it.)

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I say again, I don’t think they’re being sarcastic or trying to be cruel, I think it was an honest question.

But Popo can speak for themselves.



Please calm down. This sounds horrible, but it’s not a sample to all neighbourhoods or parents to keep there kids enclosed in home.
How would these kids learn, when older, to stand alone? As you hopefully know not by listening (do they ever?), but by, hopefully not to harsh, experience.


My Wife and I both feel pretty strongly about raising independent, self confident kids. Our goal was to keep a pretty good watch on them, without their knowing we were doing so.I have to admit that even with them being teenagers, I worry about them doing exactly the sort of things I did at that age. In my daughter’s case, that means heading up into the mountains in the morning on a four wheeler, and staying out until dark. I did the same thing, but for me it was a motorcycle. My parents also show a lot more concern for my kid’s safety than they ever did for me, at least from my memory of things. And of course when we were in Japan, we tried to give the kids the same autonomy as the other kids had. It was not always easy to do so.


Grandparents. Talk about your unconditional love. Once my mom became a grandparent, all of the hardline rules went out the window. I feel like grandkids are a combination of their favorite pet and other people’s wonderful children. I think it’s because they can love, worry, but they also celebrate that fact that your kids are your problem now. :wink:


I’ll never forget a conversation I had with my sister in 2001. She expressed a fear of Saddam Hussein, and I asked her if she really thought he was getting chemical weapons ready to attack her tiny rural town. She very directly implied that if I wasn’t afraid then I was a bad parent.

I didn’t let it get between us but I was a little shocked. The number of things we have a moral duty to fear has multiplied since then.


My kid just started biking to and from middle school - not quite 2 miles each way - having a phone i can text him on just makes this all so easy. I don’t care what he’s doing, really, but as long as he answers my text promptly, I am going to do my best to give him as much lead as he can manage.


I was partially raised by wolves. But then some gypsies showed up, chased off the wolves, threw me in a sack and raised me the rest of the way.


That’s why I tried to just ask you about how it has affected your decisions, instead of offering judgy bullshit. If you don’t want outrage, then don’t react with outrage. I was not getting opinionated or lecturing you.

Sorry, but I had no way to know that they were executed before reading your link. I guess you might appreciate that there can be a big difference between instances of the killer being gone, or possibly still out there doing the same thing to others.

Friends of mine have been murdered, as well as several sincere attempts on my life. So it is not a purely abstract thing for me. People gauge risks and worries in different ways. My ex had never had much bad happen to them, yet they were almost cripplingly cautious. Yet I had been beaten, raped, drowned, shot at, and have always been more concerned about teaching my kids to survive problems instead of always hide. Our experiences had led us to thinking these things through in very different ways. They both have certain advantages and disadvantages.


Saddest story I’ve heard in awhile.

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Friday the Thirteenth Part XIII, in which Jason targets adults who fail to watch their kids, instead of targeting teens who smoke or have sex.


Eh, welcome to modern media.


When will people understand that anecdotal evidence (no matter how horrifying) is not the same thing as proof? I obviously feel terrible for you and your entire community, but excessively protective over-parenting does nothing to make your kids any more safe and may in fact lead to more rebellious and risk-taking behaviors in your children as they get older.


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