How misophonia, aka "sound rage," can destroy relationships

There’s a radio commercial from a bank and every time they say ‘debt’ , they whisper it because … people don’t want to hear it… I can’t stand it… not quite ASMR… but the cadence of the read halts with the word and yeah… murderous rage.

People that constantly sniffle or clear their throat gotta go, I’m sorry. you suck.

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Your examples are not the kind of thing that sets off people with misophonia, though. Lots of people are bothered by loud noises like leaf blowers.

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My spouse has misophonia. She would NOT appreciate this suggestion, so I’ll just keep it to myself as I chew ice.

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The sounds that set me off:

  • Loud chewing (I just want to leave the room!)
  • “Saliva-clicking” radio announcers (why not drink some water before you click click click on live air?!?!)
  • Mechanical keyboards (that furious and bursty clackety click click clicking of hipster developers drives me insane).

Oh, and I’ve got one other super power, too: I can’t recognize faces (prosopagnosia)

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Just checking in with my autistic people in the comments. It’s like misphonia, but for most of your senses! All the time!

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I had a colleague who’s voice just grated on my nerves. It was a normal voice. There was just something about the octave i guess. I feel the same way about the sound of cell phone speakers.

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In most of those cases (jury out re whistling) they make me angry because they smack of lack of consideration for others. The noise is annoying because it is unnecessary and the noise-makers do not realise how inconsiderate they are being.

Loud conversation on the street corner? Why can’t you just talk in normal conversational manner?

Leafblower at 7am? Don’t be a jerk.

Leaving your dog out all day? You probably have no idea that it barks ALL DAY. But if you do this, you probably don’t care. Total lck of consideration.

I do not have misophonia, and my annoyance at such noise is not a cause of clinical symptoms (possibly not with you either @joelfinkle) but it does raise the blood pressure and worsen the temper.

ETA What @MrShiv said.

That would be my boss. He whistles AND sings. It’s like a cat with a bell on its collar. We always know where he is in the office.

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For me, it’s the sound of people who just can’t STFU once in a while.

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My daughter used to have a really hard time anywhere with blenders, or bathrooms with hand dryers.

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Totally have this!

Eating sounds drive me loco.
Cannot eat a meal in silence, TV, background chatter, music required.

I blame childhood dinner table trauma.

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What’s the opposite of misophonia? Because I don’t even particularly mind nails down a blackboard, or any of the other noises humans are supposed to hate.

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You already post the way to make It happen!

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Etymologically speaking, philophonia, although that seems to exist mainly in obscure album titles. The other way of putting those elements together would be phonophilia, but that seems to be used specifically for someone who like records and audio technology.

In any case, that would be the opposite of misophonia, which I would have thought to be an abnormal liking for certain sounds. What you’re describing is more of the lack of misophonia than its opposite: amisophonia, if you will.

I’ll get my coat.

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Aphonia?

Apparently not.

Screen Shot 2023-01-27 at 13.01.33

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That’s not what misophonia is.

I have a pretty strong case of it, so I always appreciate stories like this that help raise awareness of it. It’s a genuine nearly uncontrollable rage triggered extremely quickly by very specific sounds. Chewing and similar mouth sounds are probably the most common trigger.

As I’ve gotten older I’ve developed coping strategies for it, but it was a real problem when I was younger. I punched my sister once, completely without warning, because she started eating cereal near me. It was totally unexpected for both us and needless to say we had a family meeting about that little incident.

I had a coworker who ate cereal right next to me in morning meetings every day. I started wearing an ear plug on that side to that meeting. It was genuinely necessary to maintain a good mood in that important daily meeting.

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Me, too. We were just talking about this in the house recently. I wonder how much of the sounds would drive me crazy if I hadn’t been so harshly scolded as a kid. We’ll never know, of course, but it does help put it into perspective and make me not want to be like the people that caused me the trauma. If I feel it aggravating me, I just turn on the radio or put on a record. Luckily don’t have to worry about it in the office anymore, but like @VeronicaConnor, when I did still work in an office, I found coping mechanisms.

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The flipside?

Unthanks for the retractable pen nib visuals.

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