Iz me:
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Don’t miss understand, marriage and kids sparks joy. (Although I do hate that phrase as a rather shallow approach to life.) Rather, the friends do not.
Gor example if your friends dislike your wife, even if they politely never mention it, then you don’t want to see them. If your wife dislikes an acquaintance, then that acquaintance is not useful. If your brunch is on the same morning as Music Together, I know exactly which I’d rather be at.
They are too few hours in a week to spend them with people you only sort of like.
EDIT: More briefly, my first post was simply to illustrate the problem people face: the challenge of fitting your friends into your life once you admit that they are the least important enjoyable part of it.
This is a great example of how sexism hurts men too! That’s a point that’s often underemphasized, as conversations around gender equality tend to be framed as a zero sum game.
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You don’t think women have all those same barriers to keeping friends?
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Friends?
Kicked all those assholes to the curb years ago.
No regrets, FFF
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Works during pandemics, too.
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Always suspicious of old friends ‘checking in’ after years gone by. Real estate sales? Insurance? Bone marrow? When you’re trying to round up soldiers it means there’s a new battle to fight. (I’m just kidding, I generally welcome reconnecting with old friends, and if I can help them that’s fine too)
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I never really got asked if I was helping out/babysitting for my wife when I was out with the kids without mama. Sometimes, though, I wish I did get asked. My answer would just be Nope! No explanation needed, let them noodle it around for a while.
Generally, I agree with you @VeronicaConnor that this is an example of how sexism hurts men too. But as a dad, I never let it hurt or offend me. I like my kids and I think time with just me (or just mama, which is way more frequent) is good for them (and me!). BTW, just wanted to say I appreciate your comments around these BB parts, glad you’re here!
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I’ve just been thinking about the way’s in which I’ve been maintaining my friendships with some of my male friends, and in several cases, we’ve been hanging out when they take their kid to the park. (Also some of my female friends). Especially with small kids, it’s quite possible to have an adult conversation whilst the kid has fun. And a second pair of eyes is always useful around toddlers 
I don’t know what people think when they see two guys walking round a park with a small child, but it amuses me to think that some of them might think we’re a couple.
(Most of my friends have been lucky enough to get decent maternity and paternity leave, but I suppose this is one of those ‘burdensome European regulations’ that will be kicked to the curb in the sunlit uplands of brexit)
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