That bird wearing a Timex?
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These days, Iām afraid someone might punch a swan, though.
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Genius
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Iām afraid I canāt do that.
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Iām with @SpunkyTWS. I canāt stand at the edge of a high precipice, but I can certainly get down on my belly and shimmy up to peek over.
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Oh, Iāve heard that one quite a few times. Iām sorry folks, I canāt really get it. I float like a cork.
Iām more scared of what might be in the water. I can float on my back till the cows come home, but sharks donāt like lean cuts.
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Sax mouthpieces arenāt properly built for that. Although I did see a fellow Sousaphone player knock his two front top incisors out on his tuba mouthpiece when he slipped on a small patch of ice when we were marching in the Seattle thanksgiving parade.
Somehow he managed not to get any blood on his expensive uniform and āpretendedā to play the rest of the march.
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āHell yeahā
said the guy who built a flame thrower out of a Zippo, a pesticide sprayer, and a few gallons of kerosene when he was 16.
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I always imagine tripping over or bumping into the banister/guardrail. They always seem to be so short that theyāre below a human bodyās center of gravity. Whatās supposed to be a safety feature, my mind highlights as a trip hazard.
I float like a rock, so I get it. I can walk along the bottom just fine, but if itās so deep that my head would be underwater, I couldnāt do it for very long.
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Iām with you, I love floating in the water no matter how deep it is.
What can be in the water is much more terrifying. Not a fan of leaches or water snakes(damn those things are fast). For a while after taking microbiology classes I was afraid of what was in the water. So many tiny things you canāt see that can be nasty.
I got over it by summer because I usually define a good summer by being able to go in at least three of the great lakes.
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Nope, nope, nope.
I got vertigo yesterday climbing up a set of metal steps that had treads but no risers, so you could see through them, and that was enough. Even though there was no feasible way I could have squeezed through.
Strangely enough, I didnāt get vertigo on the way down those same steps.
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I cannot step on to a down escalator without holding on. Iām afraid to take a header on the thing. I see other people getting on without holding on and itās like they are walking on water to me. Really only presents a problem with I got my hands full with stuff and need to shift it around. It has to my right hand that holds on to it (which I just realized).
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Those are inaptly named Mute Swans, and they are royal assholes. Trumpeter Swans will not set a nest anywhere humans tread with regularity. Trumpeters are notably not assholes.
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Someone missed that this was fiction. It overly romanticizes both pet geese and Southern cotton farming.
One thing Iām not afraid of: the minutiae from my childhood my brain canāt let go of.
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Am I afraid of getting a Donald in the questions thread?
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When I lived in NYC, I was in the basement with the lights off one night, trying to stay cool in a heat wave. I watched as somebody pushed the window open, popped the screen out, and started to climb down. When they were down to about their shoulders, I loudly said āHI!ā and watched as they froze and in a panic began to hurry back up out of the window. I touched their legs and asked āWhere are you going? Would you like some tea?ā, but they didnāt answer. They shit scared.
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Now imagine how afraid you would be if you suddenly realized that you were not holding and blowing into a saxophone, but a goose!
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