Meet the people who've volunteered to die on Mars

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Surely someone will have perfected the science of the space vasectomy by then?

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Going to Mars almost sounds tempting now.

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Or fix the humans so they can’t reproduce.

Also, beer. Maybe not take any with you, but plenty of time to brew it while there.

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And if the lower ambient pressure in the habitat is impairing the bubbles, you can always build a hyperbeeric chamber.

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Abstinence only works!

I think you mean they volunteered to live on Mars, right?

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If you do manage to get any on board you should probably save it for arrival instead of drinking it en route. Apparently carbonated beverages aren’t much fun when the gases just sit in your belly instead of floating upwards where you can discreetly belch them out.

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yea, um there will be sex

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I’ve heard rumors that a few of them plan to run off and start their own colony inside a glacier.

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A semicolony?

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Don’t hold your breath. These folks have no chance - none whatsoever - of going to Mars. Mars One is about collecting application fees. Their timeline is pure fantasy, not even pretending to have anything to do with reality. Their economics for a manned trip are pure fantasy.

That doesn’t mean nothing good will come of it. They’re planning an unmanned lander - paying Lockheed Martin to build a duplicate of their Phoenix Lander.

As of a few months ago they’ve raised $544,026 collecting application fees. Now they just need to raise the other 99.9985% of the $350 million needed to build the lander. If they do that soon, perhaps LockMart can have it built by their 2018 launch date. And assuming they can con a second similar round of would-be astronauts to raise the same amount, then they just need to raise the remaining 96% of the $56.5 million Falcon 9 launch cost.

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“With current technology we can rocket humans to Mars in about nine months”

That really needs an asterisk. It reads like it’s saying a lot more than is supported by current realities.

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While the two-way communication back to Earth is going to be slow, the transmission of new ‘stuff’, such as TV, should be reasonably fast. Of course, you will get to see new series quite a while after everyone else, but you know that no one else can spoil it for you!

I’m a bit worried about this ‘drill for water’ thing as well. I assume they would attempt to grow stuff and a ton of stuff would be sent before them.

Yeah. I did hear once, somewhere, that sex was for making babies but I didn’t believe it.

It also kind of glosses over the “getting them down safely with enough supplies to survive for extended periods of time” part.

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If I was the female, I’d be having my tubes tied and a uterine ablation (aka, you don’t get your period again, ever, but without compromising the hormonal needs of the female body). Then, assuming they’re both STD free, the payload that would have been used on condoms can be used for something else.

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It’s different from Minnesota.

Agreed. I mean, they’re willing to ask for people who agree to live out their lives on another planet, but not willing to ask them to get sterilized first?

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