Meanwhile, at the Warrenton Police Dept: “Hey, someone head over to Good Fellas Pizza and check them out.”
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The week of Picture Day at school.
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Missing part of headline in one box: “in LEGO”
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Would you pay for three minutes of silence in a noisy public place? In the mid-20th century, plenty of people did, by dropping a dime in the jukebox to play a record that didn’t have any sound recorded on it.
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Back of my mind thought: Is the DeSantis campaign brain trust releasing bears to hurt their enemies? Are school libraries next?
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It has a biblical precedent…
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My favorite Bible story: “Go up, thou bald head!"
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A Danish artist has been ordered to return nearly 500,000 kroner (€67,000) to a museum after he supplied it with two blank canvasses for a project he named “Take the Money and Run”.
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I resisted the temptation to post this in languages.
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Jones’ new memoir, Leslie F*cking Jones (out now), features a chapter titled “Killing Whoopi Goldberg,” in which the comedian details a time she smoked weed and teamed up with castmate Kenan Thompson to write what the pair found to be a hilarious sketch. Both stars had previously played the Oscar-winning View moderator in past sketches, but this time they wanted to ask the real deal to make a cameo on “Weekend Update.”
“In the sketch, Colin [Jost] would say, ‘Leslie, I know it’s you,’ and Whoopi would say, ‘No, no, I know Leslie plays me, but it’s really me, I’m really Whoopi,’” Jones writes in the book. "Colin then says, ‘Yeah, yeah. So what would happen if I do this?’ and pulls out a gun. Whoopi looks terrified. ‘Yo, no, seriously, I’m Whoopi Goldberg. I’m not Leslie, I’m really Whoopi.’ Colin looks at her, doesn’t believe her, says, “Oh yeah…’ And then shoots her.”
Jones writes that the sketch would have cut back and forth between panic in the studio as Jost and co-anchor Michael Che realize the real Goldberg is bleeding out live on air and a station break pretape of show boss Lorne Michaels taking part in various activities like riding a horse, playing golf, and taking a shower, with his voice-over saying, “We’ll be right back, baby” in between shots of the onscreen slaughter.
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In other bear news:
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Holy gear lash, Batman!
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“Racism laundering”
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Florida man sets fire to car belonging to ex-girlfriend who also happens to be his cousin, police say
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