Ohio woman is suing a sperm bank after she became pregnant with sperm donated by a black man


#1

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#2

File this one under “not actually racist,” I think. The sperm bank failed to hold up their end of the contract. There’s nothing wrong with wanting your kid to look like her parents; awkward questions aren’t the end of the world, but they’re not fun either.

Reminds me of another over-sensationalized case, where a woman sued her employer for being forced to work with a large black man, OMG RACISM. It turned out she’d been raped by a large black man and had an uncontrollable PTSD/panic attack reaction, had explained this before being hired, and the employer had promised to accommodate her at the time.


#3

There’s some ambiguity, but by and large it sounds like these are caring parents. I do think that most of the article speaks to the practical difficulties posed by a segregated society and systemic racism.


#4

There is a racial element here (though couple do sound like loving parents) but there’s nothing OK about a sperm bank having such shoddy procedures that they could make a mistake like that.


#5

This has got to suck for the daughter when she looks up her parents name one day :frowning:


#6

Sticky situation.


#7

It may not be racist, but still, can you imagine explaining it to the daughter when she’s older?

Honey, we sued the sperm bank who gave us your father’s sperm, because we didn’t want your father to be the father of our child. So, basically, we wish some other kid had been born instead of you.

Anyway, that reminds me. Each time my wife and I leave the doctor’s office from our pediatrician visits, we look over the paperwork and smack our heads: “D’oh, it still says she’s a completely different race than she is. We keep forgetting to have them fix that.” Some day this will catch up with her…


#8

Yep, this doesn’t sound like it’s a negative statement about the parents of the child. Rather they’re trying to ensure other parents will not receive something other than “as advertised” when using the bank’s facilities. This is a very serious issue.

It isn’t just race that sperm banks advertise. They may also do genetic medical screening. If they aren’t told donors from a bank may not have been adequately screened for certain genetic diseases, parents trying to avoid expression of a recessive trait could find themselves with a very sick child on their hands - when they only used the bank to avoid that situation in the first place.


#9

Would they have sued if their daughter was a dark haired caucasian baby instead of the blonde hair blue eyed one they asked for? If their little girl eventually finds out about this lawsuit, her feelings of self-worth will likely nosedive.


#10

As much as I do agree the mothers have grounds to sue the sperm bank, I gotta say my own daughter would completely freak out if she was in this situation and I immortalized it on the Internet.


#11

She knows them already.


#12

You want a child, but only one whose genes fall within a certain category or spectrum? How is that not eugenics?

I get that, legally speaking, the entire exchange is essentially a business transaction, and that an error in fulfilling the terms of the negotiated contract is legally actionable, but for fuck’s sake people: we’re talking the birth of a human being, not the Amazon delivery of designer jeans - how can there be such a thing as “the wrong color” for a baby girl?

I find this kind of mindset disgusting, petty, selfish, and all around abominable. Children as property; gametes divorced from human interaction and intimacy, available for cash on demand; society calmly mistreating a little girl because her skin is the wrong tone. To hell with it all.


#13

Yes, they paid for the sperm of donor X and received the sperm of donor Y. Now, the question is when would they have discovered the mistake if it was your example (Dark haired + Caucasian).


#14

People only date people they find attractive, how is that also not eugenics?


#15

Well sure, but they are going to have to go through life explaining that their daughter is not adopted, and that her partner really is the child’s father. I became a father knowing that my child would be half Chinese. Thats eugenics too. We do that when we choose our partners.


#16

People don’t date their children.


#17

It’s not eugenics because eugenics is a social policy imposed from on high, and this is two people making their own choice. It’s no more eugenics than choosing your partner based on your perception of their qualities (genetic, economic, or character) as a parent. While it’s not something I would do, since I don’t plan to have kids anyway, I certainly would not begrudge anyone else the right to make their own reproductive choices.


#19

I think your anger is misplaced. These people wanted a child, and they needed a donor. I suppose they could have said “just pick a random donor” but that’s not how it generally works; the donors are chosen by traits, and if they wanted to have a child with a black donor they would have chosen that. But instead they chose to have a baby with a white donor because, as most people do, they chose to have a baby that looks like them. Nothing wrong with that. They’re not abusing the child and they’re not saying the child is “the wrong color” they’re saying the IVF clinic made a mistake and they should be held accountable.

As for this idea that the child is somehow going to be scarred by this lawsuit, I think a new house in a more racially tolerant neighborhood and a fully funded college education will ultimately mean she’ll be okay.


#20

Right there with ya!


#21

It’s not actually racist, the couple just wanted a white baby.

Cramblett said she and Zinkon love their 2-year-old daughter, Payton, very much and wouldn’t change anything about her . . . According to the lawsuit, [the couple’s] excitement about the pending birth was replaced with "anger, disappointment and fear.

The couple was excited about the pregnancy, until they discovered the baby’s father was black. The couple loves their little girl very much and they wouldn’t change anything about her, except her father’s race.

Yeah. Totally not racist.