Patriot Act's author to spooks: roll over or you get nothing


1 Like

Demanding the NSA voluntarily fix themselves is akin to using this gimmick to fix a shotgun wound to the face or gut.

When a primary problem is the NSA’s repeated and blatant lying Congress, this demand equates to: “Stop lying to us (in ways that we find out about)!”

Dear Congress, how about instead of bargaining with the NSA, we just seriously de-fund them and also not reauthorize any of the Patriot Anti-Constitution Act?


I wonder how hard it would be to get the data center and phone central office workers to cut the fibers leading from the gizmos that the NSA installed?

1 Like

Also, my German is pre-K, but Google Translate confirms that this guy’s last name (Sensenbrenner) literally translates as Scythe Burner? I guess that makes sense for a scorched-earth style of policy making.


Dear Mr. Sensenbrenner,

It’d be a shame if anyone was to find out about your predilection for goat-fucking. What’s that you say? You don’t fuck goats? Well I’m sure we can “find” some evidence that you do. And who do you think the public will believe? Us or a known goat-fucker?

-Totally Not the NSA


A video of that, if it were to come to pass, would make a great bookend counterpoint to the computer destruction at the Guardian. Especially if they used axes.


I wonder when someone will run this trick in reverse… “What? My hard drive is full of Satanic Communist Jihad Animal Porn? That must have been the NSA!”

And indict James Clapper and Keith Alexander for perjury and treason. Aim for the death penalty to deter those who would try this again.

1 Like

I’m going to sound like a sarcastic jerk, but there is no way Congress will seriously de-fund the goose that keeps laying golden, secret-filled eggs. Those babies are the currency of all the three-letter agencies.


You don’t sound like a sarcastic jerk, but you do sound like a possible person of interest.


…And Sensenbrenner actually thinks that Congress ordering a bunch of swine who happily break every law they encounter to disband will stop them ?

That’s adorable. A guy who wrote an act as stupid and un-American as the Patriot act in the first place, in order to stop a bad thing, still believing that THIS TIME - NO, REALLY I DO ! - he has The Answer To Our National Nightmare.

Obviously, Sensenbrenner doesn’t grasp the central point of “Frankenstein” - Much like Ted Cruz and Dr. Seuss: Grandstanding, panicky, dangerously dumb idealogues who are convinced that they’re smartest guys in the room.

This is an interesting bit of theater. What I’m reading is that they want to keep 215 but they need some concessions from the NSA so they can get re-elected after they reauthorize it.

If Sensenbrenner had real concerns about 215 and the abuses against everyone on the planet, he would not even consider reauthorizing 215.

This topic was automatically closed after 5 days. New replies are no longer allowed.