You are, of course, correct. Gamer culture is composed of many subcultures, many only barely related. However, the problematic gamer culture is what gets talked about, not the inoffensive ones. For example, the Sims are highly popular with both men and women, offend very few, and is practically invisible as far as the media is concerned.
So, for this discussion, people are (incorrectly) using “gamer culture” to refer to the “FPS player culture” because that’s the only culture that’s interesting for outsiders to discuss or analyze.
Note, this media attention to only one subculture can be destructive, as it makes it easy for even participants in the gamer market to forget that the other subcultures exist. People forget to design and market for those outside the subculture, participants in gaming are told this is what “gaming” is like and (especially youngsters) try to conform to media expectations…
Agreed, or perhaps women have higher standards for care than men :-). There’s no doubt that statistically, women do more care-giving than men.
However, toyg’s humor aside, as responsible parents, we all give up a great deal when we become parents. The question is what is given up. And by observation (and huge generalization), I’d say when we become parents, many men give up most leisure outside of some gaming, and many women give up most leisure outside of some socializing with peers.
Now, I know of several women of which that is not true (gaming, reading or knitting being examples of the one leisure that survived having a child), but it does mean that many will drop out of gaming not because they were forced out by social pressure and inadequate fathers, but because gaming wasn’t what they needed to keep sane.
No, but there are people that common culture and the media have chosen to represent men and women. In this case, the “leaders of women” are those who are poking at the sexism in FPS and other gamer cultures and the “leaders of men” are the misogynists who threaten violence and start Gamer’s Gate.
Personally, If I have to be pigeonholed for outside consumption, I’d have preferred to be represented by the “leaders of women” any day :-).