Just from a pure design perspective, you GOTTA love the commitment to overall length, while still forcing back seat passengers to burrow into the rear without their own door. Pure, exquisite luxury.
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Yeah had to check. That thing’s 20 foot long. The minimum length of a parking spot is 18 foot…
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Might as well replace the steering wheel with a tiller. And don’t forget to pack the seasickness bags for any of the passengers not accustomed to the body roll and general feeling like you’re driving on a gently rolling surf when going down the highway.
My buddy had one kind of like this in college. Surprisingly it wasn’t terrible to drive except that the brakes were undersized for its apparent 100 metric ton gross weight. You had to submit your petition to reduce velocity in triplicate to the car’s momentum committee before it would consider coming to a stop. Running yellow lights was basically mandatory because you’d never stop in time.
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“So hurry up and bring your jukebox money”
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This does not so much corner as wallow.
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Plenty of capacity in here to take the bins to the recycling center, but much lower loading height than a modern pickup bed.
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I bet it doesn’t make a polite, “This vehicle is reversing” sound when you back it up; something more like this seems appropriate.
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My grandmother had a '79 Continental sedan in battleship gray. It was absolutely massive. She put a sofa cushion on the driver’s seat so she could see over the steering wheel. It was like a model USS Missouri in a bathtub when it pulled into our driveway: all pitch and roll as it recovered from the short turn and ramp.
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Oil changed in October? So it’s like a month overdue for the next oil change?
Because '77 Lincoln.
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F*ck yes; SO tacky but so much fun. +1 Point for the Barry White.
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I drove one of these from Iowa City to LA in the mid-'80s when helping my father move. On a friend’s advice we took a scenic route through the Colorado mountains. In retrospect it wasn’t really the car for it.
I had a '69 LTD for a while as a grad student. (It was good practice for that later cross-country drive with my dad). At some point a cylinder blew; our mechanic advised us to not repair it; after all, we still had 7 cylinders left, that’s plenty. When the gas tank started to leak we sold it to someone who used it to rob a bank later that day. He probably wished he had that 8th cylinder.
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208 horsepower from a 7.5L V8. The malaise years are just crushingly sad. A beautifully preserved land yacht for sure, though.
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Many years back I parallel parked my elderly neighbor’s ‘74 Chrysler New Yorker sedan … with broken power steering. That was a memorable experience.
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When I was younger I worked for a car dealer in Seattle who had me fly to LA and pickup lease returns and drive them back home. (It occurred to me later that I could have been an unknowing mule).
One of the cars I brought back was a navy blue MK IV with white leather guts and a moon roof. I decided to head up the PCH instead of I5. Took several more days than normal and so was the last time I made the trip. But what a trip!
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An old friend in S. Coliforniyah had a term for these, LTDs, and similar old great hulking brutes. He called 'em Tuna Clippers. 
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“An old friend in S. Coliforniyah had a term for these, LTDs, and similar old great hulking brutes. He called 'em Tuna Clippers. ”
I had a 1977 LTD…slightly smaller than this Lincoln, but still. Whenever I had a passenger I would adopt nautical terms, “You note She responds well to the helm…” etc. I was not appreciated in my time.
I had a friend who referred to this type of car as “The Basic Unit” but he seemed to gravitate to various iterations of the 1973 Buick Riviera and that can only be love
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A friend had one in high school. All of us drooled at it, until he got drunk and totalled it.
Another friend had one, and it about killed him to sell it. At least I got a ride in it before he sold it. [edited to add:] I was in the back seat, and spent a lot of time looking up and behind me, out that amazing rear window.
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Found
On
Road
Dead
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My mother had a '73 4 door Continental in that same color for a while back in the mid 90’s, and “land barge” is an adequate description for it. The thing had some gremlins in it (It was a mechanic’s car, after all…) such as an inoperative fuel gauge; Mother put $10 buck of gas in it every other day, but there was more than one time that I had to push the thing off the road into the gas station. 
The car also was previously owned by a cigar smoker, but it was one of the brands where the smoke stench wasn’t too horrifying. Mother ended up trading it in to a ford dealership for it’s antithesis, a 94 Aspire with no A/C and a manual transmission in ‘rose pink’.
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