Waste away at Jimmy Buffet's new retirement community

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2017/03/02/waste-away-at-jimmy-buffets.html

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I’m my twilight years, you’ll find me living’ it up at the Hotel California.

Such a lovely place…

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I’m taking a pass on that one.

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Quick: is there any artist that broke through in the last say 5-10 years that may be able to credibly sell a retirement community in 40-50 years?

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I envision a bunch of old, pasty-faced, heavyset guys in Hawaiian shirts getting drunk by the pool every day with foam shark fins on their hats while loudly slurring along the lyrics to “Cheeseburger in Paradise.”

I’m not a Jimmy Buffett fan, but he is a marketing genius. He can release any album or product and his loyal following will eagerly snatch it up.

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Not in the past 5-10 years, but Gene Simmons will probably take a shot at it. He already has a line of KISS caskets available for the “long term” retirement plan.

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“Latitude Margaritavile”

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I guess now that Bill Paxton is no longer with us, there is no competition from Club Dread

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I had that thought, too! Supposedly, Dimebag Darrell from Pantera was buried in a Kiss Kasket.

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I smell hippies. Old hippies.

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I thought Key West was that community already.

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I wonder if there will be an on-campus AA meeting?

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A pirate looks at 70?

Also, coconut palms won’t grow that far north. Yet…

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Jay-Z and Kanye will open a home in France for aging ballers;

You escaped what I’ve escaped
You’d be in Paris getting fucked up too

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The Wu-Tang Clan seems like a natural fit, too. The clan had a Wu-Mansion at one point.

“For Older Gods…”

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A retirement community in Florida?! Genius! I never would have thought of that.

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i’m not sure what the Gen-X equivalent of this is going to be, but i am certain we’ll have an arcade and classic rock piped in everywhere.

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You think Gen-Xers will be able to afford to retire?

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Those Rascals…

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