I think I might have a window on that. I lived as a woman until the age of 40 before I transitioned. This creeping sexism, and the shitty comments, and crap attitudes exists everywhere. Micro-aggressions exist as a symptom of the ugly truth.
Before I transitioned, I thought the world was shitty to everyone. As soon as I hit about 6 months on testosterone, and was being read reliably as male, it’s like someone turned off a switch. All the day to day shit I went through for 40 years, was gone.
Suddenly, I could ride the bus or walk down the street in peace. Nobody looked twice at me. I could go to Home Depot and pick up some house parts without some clerk or other store patron condescending to me. Car stores were no longer fraught with sexist shitheels giving me bad advice because I looked like a woman.
These online assholes didn’t develop in a vacuum. They exist. They say shitty things in real live meat space. They are the store clerks that argue with you on what you “really” need to fix your sink. They are the guy that casually tells you in a college class discussion that your first responder medical experience means nothing because he learned first aid in the army, and besides, women just don’t do well in a crisis. They are the guys that offer you money for sex when you are trying to catch a bus to work, and not dressed remotely provocatively. It’s the guy at the bar you turn down, then starts screaming that you are a C*nt, in your face.
When you are male, this all becomes invisible. It doesn’t even happen around me. Assholes like this operate in spaces where the women they target are isolated. I don’t even see this shit happen around me now. I know that it’s an everyday thing. My female friends still face this every time they go online or step out their door. Yet, my newfound masculinity shields if from me.
It doesn’t just happen online. It happens everyday.
