Badass Dragons of the Wasteland - Round 2

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Alright folks, I’m back from the shitter, and back from the shower, and ready to talk business. Jesus god, those pancakes ran through my system like they were made by some kind of spacefaring bartender.

My first order of business is with you, Cougar @Donald_Petersen. As Prince Charming @daneel noted when I was tied to the can, you’ve not been exactly forthright with what’s in it for us on this death drive. Now, I know we go way back, and you know I love you like as if you were a Catholic Nun that used to wrap my nuckles lovingling whilst growing up, but you know god damn well we’re not all here for the same reasons.

I know you’re doing this to get your son to a better place, hopefully a place that doesn’t have as many fleas that want to ride in that mane of his. That’s all well and good. But it’s clear that some of us are here for different reasons. Some seem to want to profiteer on their repair skills {glances menacingly at Stretch}, some are here for “Fortune and Glory,” some seem to be in this for one more war-story to tell, some might be naive and looking for one last bit of good in this world, and some might be ropers trying to lead us into a honeypot.

As for me, you know me. I’m looking to get paid. I’m a trucker, a hauler, a “mule” as some call me when they think I’m out of earshot. But fact is, I get paid for a living to take some heavy shit from HERE to THERE. It’s what I do for a living, and hell, it’s about the only thing in this world that I am good at. And I am damn good at it, but I expect to be paid for it.

See, you might think that Mars is some kinda utopia for you and your brood. But me, I’m not sure. On Mars, there’s no open roads to roam. On Mars, the CB is gonna be mighty quiet. My truck, my home for the last decade and before that it was my father’s home, well, this here truck ain’t going to Mars.

Maybe I’ll change my mind, and maybe I’ll be grateful for your offer to ride that rocket ship with you. But that’s a long way off.

So I’d be extra-delighted if you could be extra-specific about what the material benefits are for helping you on each leg of this excursion. And make them worth my while. Otherwise, I’ll take my rig and drive off. I dropped other less profitable, but certainly less deadly, asks to come here. We ain’t all here to drink your kool-aid.


That said, given my long history with Cougar (I think she was the 3rd niece of my 2nd wife but, I’m not so good at public math), I’m willing to help out on this next leg.

I’m going

Option 1b - Skunkworks back door

I’m the best to open that back door quickly and silently, and I’m the best at what I do.


@davide405 Clank, I’d appreciate it if you ride with me. In return I’d be happy to continue to patronize your services, provided you beat the going rate of whatever leach like Stretch shows up later. We don’t need to promise specifics now, as the future is surely going to be unpredictable, I’m just looking for some favorable treatment for me, and for as many of the folks who join us as you can manage.

@gwwar Channing, helluva job coming in. Hope you wish to ride with us again. If not, I’m sure we’ll travel the same roads good enough.

@kingannoy Holy hell buddy. Sorry to see you’ve lost your middle fingers. Every American deserves the right to say “fuck you” in sign language. Here’s a plate toward your reconstruction.

@tetrix Hey Chief, you’re welcome to join us. To paraphrase what my paw used to say, “May the wings of your headdress never lose a feather.”


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JUNIOR’S PRIVATE LEDGER

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