** Muddlin’ Through Publicly Hailing Talionis on All Frequencies**
Greetings Captain Parvos Perfide, from David Falkayn of the Muddlin’ Through.
First, I want to thank you, Captain Perfide, for joining our revolution. There is a large I.C.U.P. fleet coming, and whether or not you fight with us, your public actions ensure you will be fighting the I.C.U.P. We appreciate the help.
Second, send my greetings to Don Mondo, President of Charybdis. A man of his stature has many responsibilities, so I hope he is enjoying a few well-earned days away from the spotlight. We trust he looks as good as ever in his Fancy Bicorne – the hat that, like the President himself, left the Badass Space Dragon in good condition, my sources claim.
However, what I really want to discuss is the Lex Talionis, also known as the" law of an eye for eye."
Under that ancient code of law, every harm must be meant with an equivalent harm. “Retributive Justice” the scholars call this. A simple enough code of justice for mentally limited lizards crawling in the muck, but wholly inadequate for running an entire galaxy. Even if you get your “revenge”, Sir, you will be doing major violence to President Mondo’s dream of a glorious Charybdis.
So how do we create this better tomorrow President Mondo dreams of, while allowing you to keep your vow of “an eye for an eye”?
Interestingly, I have an eye right here in the Muddlin’ Through.
An eye that, until a few minutes ago, was resting on Captain Pedge’s dashboard in the Quisquiliae sStruem. An eye that was in the Badass Space Dragon before it choose so unwisely to stand for a fight it could not win. An eye we have treated with great care and reverence.
But I can offer much more than just an “eye for an eye.”
If you retrieve the eye, Captain Perfide, you are entitled to that $50,000 bounty – and perhaps more as well.
If we can find a modus vivendi, the Talionis lives to fight another day. As matters stand now, you are more likely to die than to live, though admittedly you die with your honor intact. But wouldn’t it be better to have your honor, your ship, and your life intact?
I can offer more. Much still lives for President Mondo and his dreams. Your having the helm of the Talionis is but one example. But the I.C.U.P. and Scylla are coming to take these from you. That give us something in common. Whatever our differences, we both need the Coalition Annexation thwarted.
Lastly, we all share the dream of a Charybdis free of outside interference. Whatever organized (or disorganized) government emerges from this revolution, Charybdis will need someone to represent it to the outside world. A President. And wouldn’t someone wearing a Fancy Bicorne look splendid at the United Galactic Nations meetings? Smiling for the cameras? Showing Brad Nebula around?
I have proposed a lot here. Take your time to consider this. Talk it over. Consult President Mondo if you can – for this broadcast is being heard by all across Charybdis.
But until we talk, I have the eye – backed by an undefeated posse.
Sincerely,
David Falkayn, Muddlin’ Through
END TRANSMISSION
