beschizza — 2014-08-20T21:29:38-04:00 — #1
iquitos46 — 2014-08-20T21:32:23-04:00 — #2
The kid would have been ok if he had made the dinosaur black and teen-aged
miramon — 2014-08-20T21:40:08-04:00 — #3
This country is so damned weird. In half of it you can carry a rifle or a pistol openly as you shop (if you're white, anyway) and in some of the same places if your kid draws a picture of a gun at school she'll be suspended and the police will be called. Neither of these things makes sense on its own, but together it's just madness.
robulus — 2014-08-20T21:51:10-04:00 — #4
Summerville police officials say Stone's bookbag and locker were searched on Tuesday, and a gun was not found.
However they confiscated a suspicious looking swirly wormhole portal and half a sheep attached to a long rope.
davide405 — 2014-08-20T21:52:57-04:00 — #5
In fairness, I suppose dinosaurs are an endangered species
bryan_morgan — 2014-08-20T21:53:25-04:00 — #6
I'm glad I grew up when a kid could hunt dinosaurs and play cops and robbers without destroying their education.
davide405 — 2014-08-20T21:54:01-04:00 — #7
Or destroying their life...
derekballing — 2014-08-20T22:10:29-04:00 — #8
I imagine what Calvin and Hobbes comics would be like if re-drawn to account for today's childhood experience.
He'd basically be incarcerated within the first couple week's worth of panels.
iquitos46 — 2014-08-20T22:18:19-04:00 — #9
Maybe the teacher is a creationist and thinks this all took place recently.
Just what the hell would have happened to the worlds authors, short storys, script writers if idiots like this "teacher?" had looked at their school work. H. P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allen Poe, forget Jurassic Park, Star Wars any number of stories. Way to really scar a kids creativity. I really do get sick of these nanny jerks.
jardine — 2014-08-20T22:29:27-04:00 — #10
Sure. You kill one dinosaur and the next thing you know, fascists are running the country.
daneel — 2014-08-20T22:30:43-04:00 — #11
Not just missing any more. Case closed.
carlmud — 2014-08-20T22:31:22-04:00 — #12
I wrote a short story in high school that was basically a rip off of Die Hard about a guy breaking up a hostage situation in a building and then dying in the end while trying to kill the bad guy.
I was not referred to a school counselor, much less the police. My English teacher corrected my punctuation, gave me tips on how to phrase certain sentences better, and gave me a B on the assignment. I wasn't in high school all that long ago. WTF?!?
galaxies — 2014-08-20T22:32:10-04:00 — #13
So if I'm a child in that high school, what do i take away from this?
1: Never use the word "gun" in an assignment, irregardless of context.
2: The police will come and fucking take you away in handcuffs at the drop of a hat.
Get the fear in 'em early!
edit: I like how the police made sure to say he resisted arrest. Like if that kid can physically impede your arrest of him, you've got way bigger fucking problems my friend.
crenquis — 2014-08-20T22:40:51-04:00 — #14
If he had helicopter parents, 90% of the comics would not exist.
cunk — 2014-08-20T22:41:49-04:00 — #15
We don't have dinosaurs anymore.
As absurd and depressing as this story is that bit cracks me up for some reason. Like the argument is that since we no longer have dinosaurs around (like we used to in the good old days) there is no way we can offend any of them with a story about shooting them.
mister44 — 2014-08-20T22:53:18-04:00 — #16
Jesus. My creative writing assignments were all Frank Miller Sin City and Shadow pulp story influenced Crime Noir. I'd have been locked up for sure.
peemlives — 2014-08-20T23:34:48-04:00 — #17
I came here to make Ray Bradbury jokes, thank you for beating me to it.
prestonsturges — 2014-08-20T23:47:08-04:00 — #18
Wasn't there a study just done in LA that this sort of experience makes a kid 3X more likely to drop out?
And of course there are obvious and gender disparities. Yes, I'm looking at you little white girls with your secret plan for world conquest.
some_guy — 2014-08-21T00:25:42-04:00 — #19
Who will think of the dinosaurs?!! Won't somebody please think of the dinosaurs!!
tintera — 2014-08-21T00:59:07-04:00 — #20
The teacher's total fail at reading comprehension would disqualify her for teaching in a rational world. And in a rational world, the cop would read the story, look at the teacher, and say something like "are you fucking serious?"
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