Fantasy knife: a skull-faced, many-bladed forearm scorpion

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ā€œfull tangā€ - Product description

Errr, besides this being a ridiculous costume piece for teenage boys, I donā€™t think they even know what a tang is outside of the nasty orange drink.

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I can only describe it with one word:

"Classy"

With emphasis in the quotation marks.

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Historians will be perplexed, as this clearly belongs to the armament of the fabled Mall Ninja, but theyā€™ll recognize that it was made at a time when the Amazon Empire had largely decimated their natural habitat. It looks like you might be able to use it as a churchkey bottle opener, though itā€™s a bit pricey. And it probably shouldnā€™t be used if youā€™re drinking anything alcoholic, as it doesnā€™t look that safe to use while sober.

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The best part of this knife is the hilarious press shots that will inevitably result when some stody UK police functionary is photographed posing with one seized during a knife-crime crackdown. Iā€™m not sure that it would top the infamous batā€™leth incident; but same vein.

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Kinda arguable, the ā€œtangā€ extends right down the length of the forearm piece, but yeah it looks like a bunch of cheap stamped metal and cast pieces thatā€™d fall apart if you looked at it hard.

A good indication that a particular RPG group is one that you want to stay away from is when group members are passing around the BUDK catalog, seriously discussing the merits of things like this.

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Paging Richard Kadreyā€¦

Hey, no-one comes to Boing Boing for product recommendations that are in good taste!

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Ours was usually too busy discussing the current events described in The Weekly World News.

Personally, Iā€™d be taking it off when I used the bathroom.

Does anybody else find it slightly odd to read this article just after another on BB criticising liberal gun laws? Does it not glamourise a different type of potential weapon ever so slightly?

You can be in favor of gun control while still thinking that guns are kind of cool!

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I certainly got an erection the moment I saw it; if writing doesnā€™t pan out for Cory, Iā€™m sure he could get a good gig doing ad copy for fantasy knife importers.

That is; no, I think the snark was strong in this one. Itā€™s about as glamourising as Nelson pointing and going ā€˜HA-HA!ā€™

Unfortunately everyone who wants one these wonā€™t be allowed to buy one while living under their momā€™s roof.

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It makes me think of Centipedeā€™s fancy armgear in ā€˜Agents of Shield.ā€™ I donā€™t suppose it grants the users super strengthā€¦ :slight_smile:

Totally getting two of these when I switch specs from elemental to enhancement.

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Iā€™ve gotten the occasional BUDK catalog, although not in several years. Iā€™m not actually sure how I got on their mailing list, considering Iā€™ve never bought anything from them. Those things are hilarious! For the longest time, I was almost convinced the catalogs were some sort of Onion-like parody.

Is this what they call a cestus in D&D?

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DHALGREN people. paging Samuel .R. Delaney.

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I canā€™t wait to see the Daily Mail collectively pooping itself when one of these turns up in one of those hilariously pointless annual ā€œweapons amnestyā€ turn-ins they like to have in Britain.