The Soviet Union came perilously close to launching a nuclear strike on the U.S. in 1983

Deluded fundy dipshits with guns vs global superpowers that can drop miniture suns on your head.

Your move fear-mongers.

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I want the instasuns back. Together with less annoying flight ā€œsecurityā€ and less overall surveillance.

Todayā€™s threats are more annoying in side effects and less classy than the old ones used to be.

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Iā€™ll just drop this bombshell.

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These tactical nuclear demolition toys are pretty. Nice show of a linear implosion in a convenient backpack-sized package. Less efficient in boom per pound of plutonium than their bigger siblings so a bit of wasteful, but, gods, how cute and tiny they can be!

ā€¦and, of course, because the stupid test ban, they are less safe than they could be as there arenā€™t single-point detonation tests thatā€™d rule out achieving significant yield with wrongly timed or one-side-only implosionā€¦

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OR DID YOU!!!

Now Iā€™ve started thinking about it, it seems even more obvious that this would never have happened. States have long been able to assassinate each othersā€™ leaders, but they never do, because they donā€™t want it to happen to them. They have the ability to cut the handful of fragile undersea cables that make the internet work, but they donā€™t, because they donā€™t want it to happen to them. And yet weā€™re supposed to believe theyā€™d have extinguished all life, at the price of that happening to them?

Also: Russia and America are still there; they still have a fuck-ton of nucular boms; and by this time next year they could both be led by openly evil insane people. So how come Nucular Ermagerdn was such a huge threat then, if no one gives a shit now?

EVERYTHING IS A LIE AND ALWAYS WAS

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You mean, the cake is, too? :open_mouth:

If everything is a lieā€¦ furrows browā€¦ Then thisā€¦ Mustā€¦ Be too!!!

#PANIC!!!

In the mean time Shadd the Rad Drag(on) and I are gonna be doing a little civil engineering.

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Also, with no test ban people couldā€™ve been beavering away at various designs of fusion-only bomb, and we could have cheap, lightweight, fallout-free WMDs that could be used without undue strain on the conscience or the wallet.

Triple bah!

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Neutron bombs are both cool and psychotic. You kill everything, but get to keep the infrastructure.

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I donā€™t like that graph - the volume makes the Tzar Bomba look 16x more destructive than the Bravo, not 4x more destructive.

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And possibly have fusion power, and terraform-grade clean explosives. PLOWSHARE, without the dirt.

The Tzar Bomba laughs at your petty capitalist propaganda.

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Congrats on rediscovering MAD 140 years laterā€¦

ā€œI begin to believe in only one civilizing influenceā€”the discovery one of these days of a destructive agent so terrible that War shall mean annihilation and menā€™s fears will force them to keep the peace.ā€ ~ Wilkie Collins

http://wilkiecollinssociety.org/newsletter-spring-2009/

Of course whole countries no longer exist because of WWII. No matter how insane, it takes only one successful conspiracy. If nations really thought it was completely impossible, they wouldnā€™t have placed such paranoid security around their own country launching. Itā€™s improbable, but over a long enough time or the right circumstances, the improbable can still happen. With nuclear war, it only had to happen once and that was endgame.

Edited because Iā€™ve been needlessly snarky of late, and there no place for that in a friendly discussion about nuclear armageddon.

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Wait a second

Edit

 

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Cool. Can you open for my next synth metal project, Fast Neutron Therapy?

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Sadly, Tsar Bomba blew his top out of the stratosphere and flatlanders laughed at his mushroom cloud.

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Certainly!! Gotta warn ya though, we only know one song.

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Noone laughs at Bomba!! Noooonnneeee!!!

Last song theyā€™ll ever hearā€¦

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Alternative lyrics I wrote after the Shuttle had a series of takeoff aborts.

Weā€™re boarding together
The proud shuttle crew
We doubt we will take off
Weā€™re all feeling blue
I guess itā€™s the budget to blame
Weā€™re stuck aground (stuck aground)
Will we ever get up there again?
Itā€™s the final countdownā€¦
The final countdown
Againā€¦

Somebody should resign
'Cause weā€™re still down here
Next time we should design
Some less complex gear
With so many cables to fray
And leaks to be found (to be found)
Iā€™m sure that we wonā€™t launch today
Itā€™s the final countdownā€¦
The final countdown
The final countdown
Oh no.

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