A righteous mother charged in the college cheating scandal scolded others about cheating on Instragram

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/03/12/a-righteous-mother-charged-in.html

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That image was for everyone else. That kid needs all the help he can get.

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Prestigious college admissions exist to serve the class-divide. The hypocrisy in this story is of least concern. The problem is that we, as a society, still believe in the myth of meritocracy.

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Wow, it only takes $50k to get bad grade Billy into a fancy school. My entire undergrad cost less than that. Of course I didn’t go to a fancy school.

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Would Junior suffice?

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The moral of the story is cheat, just don’t get caught.

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In retrospect, might it not have seemed a little weird that the CW (cooperating witness) was talking to the parent in this formula:

"So, I just want to conspire with you about the original crime (and concomitant wire fraud) we jointly and knowingly committed on or about April 5th, 2017. Now, I'm going to perjure myself and I just want to make sure you perjure yourself, and tell them the same lie, committing an additional crime. Also, don't forget to fraudulently declare your bribe as a charitable tax deduction on your federal and state tax forms!"

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Yep, I was 100% expecting this line to come from someone on the right.

Has someone asked Jr. about his dad’s school records today?

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Damn, I finished med school with $37k in debt. Now this was 1990, so take that into account, and it was state schools, and I got lots of scholarship funding. In my field, at least, where you went means much less than how you perform. I think I like that system better.

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I’m cheating right now!

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Dude, dude, what do you think, I’m a moron?

No, of course not, sorry if I offended you. It’s your kid who is the moron, hence having to pay someone else to take a test for them.

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I’ll bet you are lying about cheating. Cheaters always lie.

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I mean, I dont mean to denigrate anyone who went to USC, but they are a state school that accepts 5000 people a year, with an acceptance rate of 18%. How is that lori laughlin, who has a net worth in the millions, needs to bribe people to get her child into this school?

I get that 18% is selective. But its not the “impossible” 6% rate of an Ivy League. If you apply to 8 or so schools with an acceptance rate of 18%, you’re going to get 2-3 acceptance letters. The only real problem is if you are fixated on one school in particular. [I’m assuming the student is reasonably well educated because they are raised by wealthy helicopter parents.]

I’m pretty shocked. This is a massive conspiracy, involving fraud at all levels: students, parents, testing officials, third-party test prep employees, college coaches. And this has been in operation for years, so hundreds (possibly thousands?) of students gained fraudulent entry into top schools. You should be more shocked! We already know there’s corruption involving legacies and jocks and the wealthy:

  • Legacies. 10% of the school population are simpletons who are let in because their parents got in and are wealthy alumni.
  • Jocks. Another 10% of the school population are simpletons who can throw a ball or row a boat.
  • Entitled. An indeterminate number are Jared Kushners, whose parents give millions to purchase their child’s admission.

Those methods would be Not Shocking. The current crimes have never occurred before or even been hinted at as a possible source of corruption. This is significantly different and should shock you.

Where is the “opportunity”? The point is, if you have $1,000,000 to spare, you can corruptly (but legally) buy your way in. You don’t have to do anything illegal. But again, a child who has access to the best high schools and tutoring available should need very little corrupt (but legal) assistance. So: I’m shocked.

Lori Laughlin will serve some jail time. She knowingly, brazenly, committed multiple federal crimes over a long period of time: Fraud, Wire Fraud, Tax Fraud. She will do at least Martha Stewart-style time, especially if she takes it to court and does not accept a plea.

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It’s a quite selective private school, for what it’s worth. I’d wager that it gets many, many times more applications than it has available slots.

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Although the selectivity is relatively recent. Up through the 1990s people in SoCal would still jokingly refer to it as the “University of Spoiled Children.”

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Nope. not one bit. My daughter is a senior in HS and has been going through the process. She originally wanted to go to either an elite 5% acceptance rate school or a conservatory (she is a singer). After working with a college prep service and going through what it was going to take…she decided between a handful of small traditional schools with around 5,000 total student campuses and 70-80% acceptance rates.

I’ve watched a ton of the other parents with all these big name schools being thrown about and I know what they went through. IMO…not worth it. Especially in her field where talent means far more than where your degree came from (if you even have one).

For those parents…the name of the institution means everything. Opportunity breeds corruption. NOT shocked at all.

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