You do realize - this was your personal ad.
What do you think women gleaned from it about your suitability as a romantic partner?
If you are confusing BoingBoing with OKCupid - then one of us has been doing it wrong.
The Message Iāve been sending is:
Iām OK if you think that homosexual sex is a pretty cool method of birth control (Iām pretty sure itās damn effective) but, sorry, thatās not my bag. Donāt try to talk me into it, please.
Well - thereās always New Zealandās South Island.
Mod note: Letās not call each other ācreatureā I am the only beast of that ilk here. Cheers.
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True. I did acknowledge this when I said you should act as if Internet content will last forever.
The gist of my post is more geared toward after that ship has sailed. It will be tough for a while, but eventually will probably go away.
Why only dads?
I think there are many things wrong with this. Firstly, it draws people into a system where money == support, which might not be tenable for non-capitalist families. How about other forms of support, such as food, clothing, education, etc?
Technically, I am a deadbeat parent, because the court orders me to pay my ex - despite the fact that the kid lives with me exclusively. So why should I divert resources to my ex if my kid isnāt there?
Also, the state involvement runs contrary to agreements my ex and I made before we married and procreated. Such as that we are a non-capitalist, non-statist family. We agreed to that from the very beginning.
Child support, or alimony?
Presumably because the overwhelming preponderance of absent parents who arenāt paying child support are fathers.
That said, Iām not in favour of public shaming at all. Far too easy for it to go wrong.
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Both, but they instantly remarried, so they donāt really need alimony either.
Yes, a series of options which NEARLY brings parity with mens ability to walk away without responsibility.
Your women have it so good posture does not fly with me.
And how lucky they are to have you as a spokesperson, sharing their opinions with us for them.
as you understand them, for women, speaking as a monogomous man who has sex with one partner in a long term committed and legally sanctioned partnership?
Dude. Friend. Brother. Fellow wearer of testicles. When it comes to issues of consent, and I say this in response to this here and other recent threads on the issue - man to man - please, PLEASE you might need to be the one listening. Specifically to those women you just spoke for.
[quote=āGulliverFoyle, post:25, topic:72089ā]
Nature does the forcing. And it isnāt punishment, itās consequences. Itās truly scary to think anyone canāt comprehend the distinction. That the woman can choose after conception and the man must decide before is the biological reality. Biology doesnāt care about human ideas of fairness. The flu isnāt fair. It still happens. Creating and abandoning a child is shameful, not having pregnancy-free sex. Welcome to the modern world, where contraceptives have evolved way beyond spilling the seed in the dirt. Medicine says youāre welcome, now use common sense.
[/quote] Just have to say, this is extremely well-said; I hadnāt thought of it in exactly that way before - I did struggle with the concept of āfairnessā in this context, and as you put, itās irrelevant. A fish might as well complain of the fairness that it canāt breath the air. If you donāt argue for a living you should.
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Good to hear your points too, and to be clear, I donāt fully agree with the idea of financial abortion at all, but thought giving an example of one suggestion that has been posited was better than nothing.
@AcerPlatanoides Iām not speaking for any women, although if anyone disagrees that it is legitimate to have an abortion because you canāt afford a child, arenāt ready for a child, have too many children already or donāt want a child with that person, Iām sorry for my presumption. Also, if anyone thinks that pregnant women should just take some responsibility rather than considering abortion for those reasons, Iām sorry to hear that.
If those are legitimate, then fairness does matter. Thereās no reason why people canāt look at ways to give both men and women more choice in reproduction, and find a middle ground between walking away without consequences and having to support a child into adulthood. There is nothing biological about child support laws, and it is entirely possible that there are ways to create better social systems that support partners whose exes do not support them for one reason or another.
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whose own case? Yours? Okay then. Mansplain away.
Or maybe feelings are not facts after all?
If a woman has sex leading to conception, she should have the responsibility of raising that child to adulthood or paying for that child to be raised to adulthood. If she wanted to avoid this responsibility, she should have taken precautions before this point. Does any sex positive woman on this thread agree with this statement?
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Ok, you and @AcerPlatanoides are doing it again. Youāre both having completely different conversations than the other person thinks theyāre having. Its like watching someone speak French to someone speaking Spanish, its close, and on paper it looks very similar, but its not. Stahp it!
Or not. I donāt want to be accused of shutting down conversation! Goodness no! 
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Can I quote you on that?
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Thanks! Sorry to have misunderstood. Mis conocimientos de espaƱol son una cabra
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But hereās the thing: if you lose your job you can petition the court to reduce or suspend payments. My ex has been pulling this for years. How many years? Our child is now 18.5 years old and he still owes money, because every time the court catches up to him heās just lost his job, is job hunting, oh I just got a new job hereās some money, etc, etc. I get a couple hundred dollars every 3 or 4 months, and the DCSS tells me "Well he was unemployed and looking, so we canāt enforce the order.
I even offered him a deal of āno current support if you pay the arrearsā, 5 or 6 years ago. He didnāt take it, because he thought Iād be able to terminate his parental rights.
This only works if you donāt get paid under the table, and you keep a job long enough for the DA to track you down and apply the garnishment. Ask me how I know!
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Alright, Iāve said my piece and Iām out. Thanks @Missy_Pants, @AcerPlatanoides, feel free to continue and I wonāt interrupt.
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Any time. Screen cap it so I canāt go back and edit my words later even.
Nooooo if you stop then Iām the thread killer!
Honestly though, I think if you two were in the same room together with beers youād be agreeing. 
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