Artisanal rock costs $190 at shop in The Hamptons


#1

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#2

Well, you do realize @frauenfelder that they don’t grow on trees?


#3

Does it keep tigers away?


#4

When in Rome, do as the Romans do.


#5

God the Hamptons are stupid. There’s a restaurant there that charges you $36 for a bottle of Budweiser. Now it’s at a seasonal branch of well known NYC scam joint Nello. But there’s a reason they picked Southampton for the second location of their surprisingly effective con.


#6

Well the rock is just a rock. The artisanal part was who ever wrapped some straw around it.


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#7

Who buys this kinda stuff, and may I have their email address(es)?


#8

We take our artisinal nature more seriously up here in Canada.


#9

“A fool and his money are soon parted when beaten with a $190 rock.”


#10

If you don’t remember the “pet rock” craze get off my lawn.


#11

It’s worth it too!

Just kidding, that’s a Rock Fact


#12

This is a funny story about the Hamptons and rocks.

I took a jewelry making class at a shop in Southampton. The jeweler would teach the classes while the shop was open. Every so often a customer would come in and request a repair.

One day this lady came in with a huge quartz pendant that needed to be reset for the chain it was on. The owner of the shop, being French, struggled a bit to communicate how he was going to adjust the setting, finally able to get through to her by saying he was going to set it so it would hang “naturally” and otherwise using the word natural a lot.

After she left he said, “What was wrong with her face???” Because the lady had just gotten a chemical peel and fillers into her lips, so her face was raw and had goop all over it, plus her lips were all puffy.

He got a good laugh at how she wanted her special rock hung all “natural” while her face was so NOT.


#13

What a con. It doesn’t even have Southampton written all the way through it.


#14

The rock and the stump must be at that new store You Must Be As Dumb As Our Products.


#15

No, Mark, you want the rock more than you want the stump. That’s why the rock costs $92 more. Didn’t you learn in school that supply and demand set prices?


#16

Personally, I want to get them both and watch them battle it out. Is that rock really worth two stumps?


#17

Two words: artisanal firewood


#18

Guh, I hate it when people buy overpriced rocks as some kind of fashion statement from an ethically shady dealer. Please, if you’re thinking of bringing one into your home please consider adopting a pet rock from a mineral shelter.


#19

I prefer all my rocks to come from free range, organic places - not corporate “rock mills”.


#20

If I was a store owner, hell, worth a shot.
And if it sells, put a few more on the shelf.

“Does it have healing properties?”
“You can rub it on your arthritic joints.”
“And it will help?”
“Um. Cash or Credit?”