Dear Naughty Boy and Princess Rembrandt.
THANK YOU
from the bottom of our variously-chambered hearts.
We couldn’t do this without you.
Love,
Rocky Road and Philosolobster
p.s. Here’s hoping that for the next rounds you get Goldie’s dice rolling not Pricklepants’.
#
Is this gonna’ work?
The Swarm is a nightmare. Alien forms of all shapes and sizes assault the outer barricades with a relentless coordination made possible by the hive mind of the Bogey. Rocky Road and Philosolobster retreat with haste to the inner barricades as their initial position becomes increasingly untenable. Due to the EMF interference of Naughty Boy and Princess Rembrandt, the sensor array of the Coleridge displays pure white noise. It’s impossible to tell how many pods have been launched, who has left the ship on Mission 4. You imagine for a moment what it would be like to face these things without their signal jamming.
You quickly put that thought out of your mind.
##Segment 2 - Inner barricades
Mission 1 results for @bizmail_public @wisconsinplatt
+-Character--------------------+----HP---+-POW-+-DEF-+-EVA-+-SEN-+-SCI-+-GLO-+
| "Philosolobster" | 98/130 | 23 | 55 | 15 | 18 | 25 | 6 |
+------------------------------+---------+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+
| SUCCESS! | Mission 1 - Fall Back Fighting
| -15HP | Battling the Swarm (GLO+1)
+-Character--------------------+----HP---+-POW-+-DEF-+-EVA-+-SEN-+-SCI-+-GLO-+
| "Rocky Road" | 79/140 | 37 | 53 | 23 | 19 | 20 | 6 |
+------------------------------+---------+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+
| SUCCESS! | Mission 1 - Fall Back Fighting
| -23HP | Battling the Swarm (GLO+1)
Mission 3 results for @dreamboatskanky @uphill
+-Character--------------------+----HP---+-POW-+-DEF-+-EVA-+-SEN-+-SCI-+-GLO-+
| "Princess Rembrandt" | 34/100 | 18 | 16 | 28 | 48 | 32 | 9 |
+------------------------------+---------+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+
| SUCCESS! | Mission 3 - Jammy Dodgers
+-Character--------------------+----HP---+-POW-+-DEF-+-EVA-+-SEN-+-SCI-+-GLO-+
| "Naughty Boy" | 100/110 | 15 | 21 | 28 | 62 | 28 | 4 |
+------------------------------+---------+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+-----+
| SUCCESS! | Mission 3 - Jammy Dodgers
Swarm Status
Estimated Swarm strength: 4760HP
Jamming strength: 50% (SEN 110)
Swarm damage output: 10-30HP
Swarm damage on breakthrough: 24-48HPGet ready…
Yes!
YOU GO GUARDIANS!!!
Come down this chimney and you’ll get something in your sock!
I think I grabbed the wrong suit.
The suit that fits in the escape pod?
I believe you’re the one who takes frequent walks outside planning your escape route.
Pretty insensitive of you to confuse Moose and Reindeer.
Have you checked the weather outside lately?
Please, join us.
Not as bad as you confusing that moose and that squirrel, but then, you just lump all mammals together, don’t you?
I’m in the midst of running some lab tests regarding long term food sustainability should things go awry in the mess.
But you’re doing great, keep it up!
You must be pretty used to this, right? Waiting around for someone else to rescue you?
Do you have any exciting stories to tell us to pass the time?
Well, this one time, on Mars, while waiting for someone else to rescue me I went and dug up an old rover to communicate with Earth, excavated a nuclear reactor for power, rummaged through laptops to find a way to communicate over visual means, created my own soil on a barren planet, grew my own food, hoarded enough of it to drive to another nearby ship, took off after replacing the windscreen with a fucking tarp and then, yes, finally got picked up by the jacknuts that left me there in the first place who finally decided to solve the problem they created.
So yes, I’m always the damsel in distress.
I’m not going to change your potting soil any more and I’m afraid I’m going to have to cut you off from my nitrogen supplies if you’re going to get surly like that. Did you know that when you raise your arms like that you look like you’re being robbed?
It’s almost easier being on the outside with the Swarm…
The Swarm has never made me think that damaging my mainspring is a good idea…
