Badass Dragons of the Wasteland - Round Three

Thanks Clank! I’ll let you start the work when I finally get a repair kit.

Likely a deal, need to see the prices in the shop first. Thanks for thinking of me.

Also, here’s a free piece of business advice I learned from my old attorney, Saul. You need a slogan, something catchy. like, “Got a Ding in your Thing? You’re Gonna Thank Clank!”

Or something, I’m a trucker, not a word guy.


That’s kind of you, and bloody generous of Mike (@kingannoy), Clank (@davide405), Sir Gonville (@daneel), Channing (@gwwar), Baltar (@SteampunkBanana) and Junior (@funruly).

I’ll keep a chit in the dash to remind me.

I propose an even split amongst the needy, certainly anything with my name on it can be divvied up just so.

Pinkie would’ve been pr … ~hmm hmm aheemm~ proud of you lot.


What do you reckon, Dorcas (@awjt) and Jack (@drman321)?

Hey Kid, come here a sec.

Look over there

You know how to spot the difference between a real mule and one who likes to pretend haul with their 4x4 on the weekends?

Assless Chaps.



Sorry. Long story involving a pack of leather boys outside Miami this one time before the flooding took that town over (or, under, as the case may be). But I have a thing about that phrase.


I think let’s not divvy it up until the replacement vehicles have been rolled, we can all see the stats, weigh in with our opinions, and then the generous benefactors should decide how they want to apportion their gifts to make the most sense.

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That’s a jolly good idea.

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GMs - any chance we can get those re-rolls today sometime? Want us to re-fill the form? THANK YOU

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Sorry about the slip-up. They’re all re-rolled now. Your new stats are up-to-date in the spreadsheet.

You may be right, Desmond, you may be right.

But there’s two things this here Burton ain’t. I ain’t one of the smarties, and I ain’t one of the humorless chaps.


You ain’t one of the humorless chaps? I’m bettin’ that you’re not one of the assless ones either, else you’d have trouble making your SHITGO work.


Bessie is in action! 6 thousand pounds of cast iron, nickel plating and wood. Guys, how do you wanna divvy up the donations? You want speed, firepower or defense in your escorts?

(Cougar watches the Iso Grifo drive off into the Wasteland in a spray of gravel.)

Well, damn. That’s the last thing we need.

(keys mic on the E.A.R.A.C.H.E. PA)

All right, you knuckleheads, listen up! We’re not gonna get anywhere but dead if we start chewing each other apart like everyone else in the Wasteland. You guys wanna live out your short days yelling and shooting and backstabbing everyone in sight, and never being able to sleep with both eyes closed? Go join the Orange County Raiders. The Bellflower Bastards are just up the road. So are the Artesia Arseholes. Or you can try to go it alone.

But if any of you want to see the light of a new day on a new world… if you want a chance at a fresh start… then you’d better quit sniping each other and start watching each other’s backs. We are in this together. I’m getting pretty goddamned tired of all the bitching about how much Repairs cost and whether anyone can be trusted. Well, you’re gonna have to trust each other, otherwise you can just hit the highway on your own and see how you like getting through the zombies and Raiders and tentacles without anyone’s help.

I can’t afford to lose anyone else. We can’t afford it. I’m hoping Sir Gonville cools off out there and is willing to give this another shot once he sees a few reminders of how brutal it is out there alone. If he changes his mind, well, at 300 feet in height and a maximum speed of 1 mph, I don’t believe he’ll have any trouble finding the Ark. But if he’s gone for good, then that’s our fault, and I won’t let it happen again.

Now, let’s get back to pulling. Pretty soon I’m gonna send some of you back to Stretch for re-supply, and that gives me an idea for our next Mission…

Now, somebody go bury that goddamned dog. Again. He’s smelled bad since the first time he died.

Cougar out.


Gonville De’Ath : Mood : Tetchy

I am just going for a drive and may be some time.


Bloody hell. Don’t make those famous last words Sir G.

112 years ago. He would’ve done a good job in the SOE.


Well color me relieved. Not the shittin’ kind of relieved neither.
Y’all are much nicer than anyone gives you credit for I can tell you that! It brings wet to my eyes that’s how nice it is. I hope I have the pleasure of having your back during this mission somewhere bubba, (@bizmail_public) Desmond (@SteampunkBanana) and Mike (@kingannoy). Growin up around these here parts since the world has gone and gotten turned over and shat on, you just dont grow used to a supportive word like that. You say thankya if you aint got murdered in your sleep by some stranger, or worse!
We aint no word-makers or nuffin like that no more but that was some pootry to my ears sirs. Thanks.

Now let’s get this shit on the road. Ima need 9HP to get to full again, which comes round on 8LP over at Stretch’s if I aint mistaking (4LP for the kit and 4LP for the HPs).

That leaves me with 4LP to spare. Let me know who needs them cause I’m willing to share.


Don’t wheel & deal too much, yet. Stretch’s price list is somewhat… volatile.


I’m always just around the 75% range, doesn’t that put me at Stretch’s mercy, regardless of whether I want to be?

Yeah… but you don’t know yet how much he’ll cost. You will soon.

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